The Lot Is Empty

Hey, what's missing from this picture?

Oh yeah, Mike Pelfrey.

Last season he had an outing so bad he felt he needed to go Grete Waitz around the Coors Field parking lot. Today, all he needed was a victory lap after going seven shutout innings giving up five hits and walking ... none. Mike Pelfrey is now 2-0, and I fear he's going to have to go undefeated to give the Mets a chance at the playoffs. He's off to a fine, fine start. Victory laps for everyone.

And outside of Luis Castillo stealing second base while Jose Reyes was retreating to the same base (fundamental much, guys?), there was really not much to complain about. I could wax poetic on how 5-0 could have easily been 10-0, but I'm not a poet, and I'm not looking a gift horse in the mouth. 5-0 is mighty nice. And 3-6 is much better than 2-7, so I'll save my complaints for another day. Can't waste them all in April, right? Besides, Oliver Perez faces Albert Pujols tomorrow. I have a feeling the complaint box will be full.

I ... Hate ... Everything About You

I knew it was a bad sign when Brian Bannister, who was a Met many moons ago, turned in a dazzling start for the Royals today while the Mets have been struggling to find starters who could give any sort of consistant effort. If John Maine had turned in an acceptable effort, there would have been no need to invoke Bannister's name (or image).

Instead, Maine gives up eight runs in three innings en route (or is that rout) to an 11-3 loss in Denver ... and I start to long for pitchers from a bygone era.

After the game, Maine said that he "hates everything about himself." (And you thought it was just the fans who are self-loathing.) Forget his starting spot being in jeopardy, Maine sounds like somebody that could use a lesson in how to love himself again ... in the minor leagues.

Bobby Jones did it.

Steve Trachsel did it.

Both came out of it for the better. If Maine's delivery is in fact all over the place, then he needs to go somewhere and figure it out. A little scary since he recently came off a period of time that was invented for "figuring it out" (you know this as "spring training"). But in this, the most important April road trip in the history of April road trips, the Mets can't afford to let him figure it out against the Rockies, Albert Pujols, Howard and Utley, or the '79 Pirates.

Maine is going so bad that not only did Gary Cohen and Keith Hernandez take calls from fans during the game who are wondering if the team needs to see a sports psychologist, but Keith is telling the masses "not to think too much", while using words like "primordial" which causes the fans to think too much about what that word actually means. When you come up with a performance which causes Keith to contradict himself in the same sentence, then it's time for some minor league rehab of the mental variety.

(And maybe Luis Castillo could use some mental health time too after going nuclear in the dugout after being nailed trying to stretch a single to a double in the sixth ... I mean, seriously now. Talk all you want about the fans losing their minds in the second week of the season but for Greg Smith's sake you have John Maine who hates himself, and Castillo who is throwing tantrums and it's April 13th! Who, exactly, are the crazy ones here?)

The More Things Change ...

A fresh new injury.

Not one but two updates on Jose Reyes.

The Mets batting average with runners in scoring position.

All present and accounted for in the SNY Mets Post Game Report sponsored by whoever the heck is sponsoring that show these days (KFC? Arpielle Equipment? Slap Chop?), and Geico Sports Night following the Mets 3-1 loss to the Marlins. It's eerie how we all want to move on from 2009, yet it wafts over you like the stench of rancid meat.

Surely after two games where a Mets offense that has the ability to make Nate Robertson look like a superstar could only muster 13 hits in 18 innings and scored seven runs mainly on the strength of the other team's weakness, Snoop Manuel, Gangsta, would have a plan for his hitters to become more productive. Maybe a change in the batting order. Maybe some extra hitting. Maybe a barbecue at Howard Johnson's house. No ...

"We need a couple guys hot at the same time." -Jerry Manuel

That's it? That's the grand plan? Hope? Pray? Plead to a higher power? I thought that was our job as fans. But no, that's the manager's grand plan. One day, that plan will work. And yeah, I know the manager can lead a horse to the plate but can't make him hit. But the problem is that Omar Minaya already passed the buck to him when at the onset of free agency, he basically said that it was up to the coaches to make the players that are already on the roster better (translated: I have no money or prayer to get anyone so you're on your own). And now, the manager's way of "making the players better" is crossing his fingers and toes and wishing upon the one star he could see through the pollution. There's nobody left to pass the buck to.

But that was nothing compared to this post game gem regarding the bottom of the lineup:

"They're not power guys but they can hit the ball out of the ballpark."

What? I don't know what that even means!!! Who exactly did he just describe ... Rod Barajas? Luis Castillo?

Al Pedrique?

Oh well. At least Jon Niese came up with a quality start, so maybe Snoop will stop being concerned about the rotation for two or three hours before the next one takes the mound. You know ... the one that isn't a hard thrower but can throw the ball hard.

Sage Wisdom

Leave it to Ralph Kiner to provide perspective during Tuesday's telecast:

"It's not even worth questioning because you know what's gonna happen ... When you're a star pitcher like he is it doesn't mean a thing what he does today, tomorrow, or the next day. It's when the bell rings that it counts and that's all they have to worry about." -Ralph Kiner on Johan Santana's rough outing on Tuesday

I really don't need to hear any more than that. And for those of you who may wonder why Oliver Perez gets the brunt of spring hate while Santana gets to go into the EZ-Pass lane I only say this: When Oliver Perez becomes a star pitcher who doesn't fall out of shape after signing a big contract, call me. Otherwise, I'll hold on to that extra standard, thanks. I was fooled once before.

Besides, Santana gave up a home run to freakin' Kaz Matsui. And anything Kaz Matsui does against the Mets should be inadmissible in the court of public opinion. For heaven's sake he once hit two home runs against Billy Wagner in an intersquad game. He's been killing the Mets ever since he was ... a Met! Hopefully the Astros will take advantage of this special offer:

"Orioles general manager Andy MacPhail said the Orioles may begin to seek outside help at second base. The status of Brian Roberts is starting to become a legitimate concern."

Gee, would have been nice to know this two months ago.

Oh well. Omar Minaya probably would have gotten little more than pocket lint for him anyway. Besides, there are greater things to be concerned with than trading Luis Castillo and how Johan Santana does in a spring training outing ... like who the hell let Roger Clemens into Port St. Lucie and why didn't security promptly throw him out for crimes against humanity? Is this where my tax dollars are going? I really could care less if all the Astros on the 40 man roster were related to Clemens. He can watch Koby on MLB.TV like the rest of us.

Easy On The Pissery

I love the Mets.

I'm sure that fact is easy to forget from your perspective as you read my constant razzes, piling on, and flat out pissery. (If Snoop Manuel can make up crackpot theories as to why Oliver Perez is wild, then I can make up new meanings for existing words, so deal with it.) So it's something I need to make it clear and reiterate sometimes. Everyone has their cross to bear ... loving the Mets is mine.

Yet I'm not one of those people that think winter is cold and lonely and that I need to inject caffeine straight into my veins to get through the 3-4 months without real live baseball. Winter is fun. This might have been more fun than others. I saw the Jets get to the AFC Championship game. I saw USA Hockey get to overtime of the gold medal game, and I'm about to go on the wild ride that is the Rangers make a big push for ninth place. Woo hoo.

And I also saw the Nets win six games ... one of them against the Celtics after they traded for Nate Robinson.

(After that I saw a chipmunk on downers with a broken leg drop 40 points on Robinson.)

Winter? Suits me just fine. A winter without the Mets? Probably did a little good for my sanity.

And yet I knew ... I knew that I was growing wistful for the Mets when I was watching the Winter Olympics, and I couldn't watch John Shuster cost the American curlers three wins on last rock without thinking of Aaron Heilman. And when all the alpine skiers started looking like Jose Offerman angrily wielding a baseball bat at a minor league pitcher, I knew I was starting to miss the game.

But when I was yelling at Carlos Baerga last night for missing an easy tag on Joe Girardi during the airing of a game that happened 14 years ago ... a game the Mets won, I knew I needed a ballgame, quickly.

Thankfully, we'll get one today.

And it's fitting that in the first game against a live opponent (don't give me intersquad ... we talkin' bout practice, man) it's Nelson Figueroa that will get the start. Not only is it nice to see Nelson get a chance to make the team after being tossed around the organization like a Jeremy Reed throw from first, it provides a certain symmetry from tossing in those long shadows that only meaningless October baseball can provide to pitching in the splashy sun that only spring training in Florida can muster up. It's Figueroa who provides the bridge between the despair of last season and the promise of 2010. And if you've reached the end of that bridge without jumping, then welcome to the season. If you haven't reached the end of the bridge, you've got about a month to get there.

But whether you're ready, or you're not, there's one thing we can all agree on:

How the hell did Baerga miss that tag? It's Joe Girardi for crissakes! A damn catcher!!! When are we going to be out from Baerga's contract so we can go sign Luis Castillo?

Junk Anew

So wait, Omar Minaya can't get anybody to take Luis Castillo off his hands by paying a portion of his remaining $12 million, but Tony Reagins found a sucker to take Gary Matthews Jr. by paying $21.5 million?

Oh right, because that sucker was Omar Minaya. It makes perfect sense now.

That's right ... Gary Matthews Jr., he of the one big year, the Mitchell Report appearance, and the not-so-steady decline, is a New York Met ... again. Omar apparently needed a one-hit wonder, and his Castillo-for-the-Baha-Men trade was rejected by Anslem Douglas.

And now, for the low-low price of $2 million, the Mets have created their own Conan vs. Leno battle, with Corporal Matthews in the role of the older Leno, while Angel Pagan ... who to the best of my knowledge has never dressed puppies up as cats or a Buggatti Veyron as a mouse ... is the younger Coco. Except that this battle isn't for the 11:30 time slot, it's basically for the right to be Carlos Beltran's backup after a month (think positive ... think positive). Now that $2 million doesn't seem so cheap anymore, does it?

And the first person to say "Umm, heh heh ... low risk high reward!!!!" is getting punched in all of his face. Because if anybody truly believes that a 35-year-old linked (allegedly) to illegal substances is going to return to his high OBP of .371 because he's got himself a "change of scenery", well I've got a late night talk show I'd like to sell you. And I'll throw in a Brady Anderson 1999 Topps card. Low risk, reward similar to finding a lost dog ... I'm willing to believe. Low risk, hit Lotto? Don't believe the hype.

As for Brian Stokes, he had no chance here in 2010. If used right, he's a valuable commodity. If 2009 was any indication, Snoop had no idea what he wanted to do with Stokes. Was he a long man? Was he a seventh inning guy? We saw him every day, then we didn't see him for a week. If he finds success for L.A., it'll be because Mike Scioscia will figure out how to use him (after he tells the story about the home run off Gooden for the 20,000th time, of course.) If he doesn't, then it'll probably be because of his own inabilities. Snoop's erratic usage of Stokes tells me that his success isn't coming here.

So basically all this trade does is create a potential logjam in the outfield when Beltran comes back. Here's where the trade may make sense ... sort of. If Pagan is involved in a trade for a Reds pitcher (keep chasing Sasquatch, Metstradamus), then you can see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel provided it's not the seven train coming out of Hunters Point. Best case scenario, this is the first of all those "moving parts" rumored to make a Cincinnati trade happen. If not, then all you have is Matthews' complaints about playing time joining forces with a locker room that just barely survived Gary Sheffield's annual tantrum. Then Omar's going to have to answer questions about the looming distraction, and then he'll wind up blaming Adam Rubin and all hell will break loose. Again. Then we'll all be wondering who let the damn dogs out.

Again.

Mythical Monsters

"The greatest rock ’n’ roll musicians are desperate men." -Bruce Springsteen

Apparently, so are the most mediocre baseball organizations.

When it was announced on ESPN that Joel Pineiro signed with the Angels, I muttered an expletive. Yeah, it's gotten that bad. And we're at the point now where a starting rotation that is in sorely need of help below Johan Santana is starting to run out of options.

So should I start lighting my candles for Ben Sheets, or should I spend the next two months searching the woods for this mythical Reds trade that's going to get us Brandon Phillips and Bronson Arroyo or Aaron Harang? It's like searching for the Yeti or Sasquatch.

(Does that make Arroyo the Yeti and Harang Sasquatch?)

But seriously, Joel Pineiro ... whom I irrationally hate ... goes to another team and I'm throwing cuss words around? For Joel Pineiro? These times are more desperate than the Mets are to trade Luis Castillo.

At least the Mets will get a paid vacation in Puerto Rico. The way the season's going to go, I don't know if we'll know the difference.

Discussions

So the Mets and Red Sox have discussed trading Luis Castillo for Mike Lowell.

Here are some other things the teams have probably discussed: the Tooth Fairy, Existentialism, and the 1986 World Series. That doesn't mean Calvin Schiraldi is wondering what meaning his life has while getting a root canal.

Besides, it seems too easy. Why would the Red Sox give the Mets a righty power bat, an expiring contract, and a hole at second base to be filled by Brandon Phillips for a guy who will be paid six million bucks to sit behind Marco Scutaro and Dustin Pedroia? Seems that's not the kind of business that the Red Sox are usually in.

Seriously, how do you go from Max Ramirez to Luis Castillo? Did one physical make that much of a difference?

Check Out The Special Guest For Times Square's New Year's Eve 2010 Ball Drop

Who better? Besides, he's been practicing all summer. Happy New Year.

First Response, Or First Tease?

You have to assume that any rumor that involves dumping Luis Castillo's contract is probably too good to be true.

Look, my past man crush on Castillo is well documented. And he deserves a world of credit for bouncing back not once (from 2008), but twice (from the pop-up). But it's also well documented that you sell high. Or at least Castillo high which means you sell mediocre.

So this rumored deal which would send Castillo to the Cubs and Lyle Overbay to the Mets is absolutely the right thing to think about. It's the third part of that deal which will make or break it, which is Milton Bradley going from the Cubs to the Jays. And Toronto, reportedly and predictably, wants no part of Bradley. (Some say the Canadian exchange rate would change Bradley from slightly perturbed and misunderstood to certifiably insane.)

If these rumors do turn out to be a pipe dream, then at least those pesky Doc Halladay to the Phillies rumors can die a horrible death too. Or the rumor that I completely made up myself where the Phillies decline the option on Pedro Feliz for the sole purpose of signing Chone Figgins, and hence moving Jimmy Rollins down in the order.

Die rumors ... die.

Baseball's Antarctica

Kristina Horner is one of a handful of bloggers who have entered a contest to be able to blog from Antarctica. Certainly, it's a unique and interesting experience, as although people are stationed there at various times, only "cold-adapted plants and animals survive there."

I don't need to enter a contest to enter a desolate region. Definitely not tonight, for at this very moment, I'm in Washington, DC. Where the locals distract themselves from the latest foible from their beloved Redskins in many ways ... beer, politics, talking politics over a beer, stalking Alex Ovechkin, and the like. For a few, brave souls, they forget about a loss to the Lions by turning to baseball in the beltway ... the Washington Nationals ... as they combine with the New York Mets to form a rivalry with a long history, fierce competition, and 193 losses combined. There may or may not be more losses in the building then there are actual fans. But for the Nationals' faithful who've arrived, they do so because they love their baseball, and they know that a bright future is just around the corner.

For the Mets' faithful who've come all the way from New York City, they do so because they need acute mental observation. Nevertheless, I'm here ... nine innings, 193 losses, one deranged blogger.

This ...

is Baseball's Antarctica. Only broken hearts and long festering angst can survive there.

Tuesday's game featured all of the broken hearts and long festering angst you're used to seeing live, except with gray uniforms. It really was a microcosm of the season: Mets have a chance to break the game open in the first inning with bases loaded and one out but only score one run instead of the three or four they should have scored. Mike Pelfrey has his bad inning. Mets have a chance to take the lead back with, again, bases loaded and nobody out in the seventh, but score nothing. ("Ooh, we have the bases loaded, who's up? Brian Schneider! Oh, let's get on that Five Guys line.") Stellar defense featuring Anderson Hernandez and Luis Castillo (and by "stellar", I mean "stellar is to abominable as Gold Glove is to Anderson Hernandez and Luis Castillo". And these are the defensive specialists, no?

Then top it off with a heartbreaking ending in which Elijah Dukes (who's defense is also "stellar" at times), makes a spectacular wall crashing catch on a ball which, if it had ten, maybe fifteen more feet on it, would have been in my lap. Seriously ... I'm the guy in the Mets jersey in the front row standing up and stopping my camera because I think this projectile his headed right for me. Seeing that a Metropolitan hit it, I should know better ... I probably would have had the youtube video of the year. Instead, I have a drunk guy in a suit putting his arm around me screaming "Meeeeeeeeets Loooooooose!!!" after saying nothing for nine innings. Awesome.

Oh, and the pointless "Let's put Frankie in down by one" move by our fearless leader which only served to keep the game close so that Dukes can win the game right in front of my nose. Rub it in, why don't ya.

The expedition continues on Wednesday.

***

Some other oddities:

A Topps lineup? Where have we seen that before?

A helmet garbage can, where have we seen that before? (I'm guessing we ripped them off on that one.)

Hey, Ray Knight! Where have we seen him before? (I'm guessing they ripped us off on that one.)

The Mets aren't the only team to honor other franchises. Never you mind that the Nationals have only been around five years.

Hey, he hasn't even played for the Nationals! Then again, Tommy Lasorda never played for the Mets yet they honored him with his own day, so what do I know?

The Quest For A Championship Continues, Can't Ya Tell?

During the Mets 4-2 loss to the Phillies, Angel Pagan went 0-for-4, snapping his streak of ten games with a stupid baserunning play.

Angel hopes to start a new streak against Jamie Moyer, today on FOX. The Mets will continue to stick to Snoop Manuel's plan to stay concentrated on what’s ahead and continue that quest for a championship. Pagan, meanwhile, will continue his own quest to find the fifth base. Luis Castillo keeps telling him there's a fifth base, much like the fifth Beatle he swears he unlocked in Beatles Rock Band.

The bad news is that the fifth Beatle looks a lot like Steve Phillips. It's a fixable glitch, unlike the Mets lineup.

That's Hank Aaron Award Nominee Angel Pagan To You, Sir

The line from Wednesday's boxscore reads as such:

A. Hernandez ss-2b-ss-2b

It's brilliant when you think about it, switching him back and forth in the same game. Because, if Anderson Hernandez goes back and forth from shortstop to second base often enough, then on double plays he could just throw it to himself ... saving Luis Castillo that pesky task of covering on double plays.

Not that it would have helped in a 15-2 disaster, which was helped along by Bobby Parnell's "learning curve." Not that a curveball was called all night ... Omir. You have more than one finger, you know. Wasn't the point to help Bobby use all his pitches now that he's a starter?

I wonder how hard Billy Wagner is hoping for somebody to claim him off waivers? (Hint: Enjoy Tampa.)

Enough Money For One Lousy Beer

I hope for Alexi Panos' sake that she's not still doing "Beer Money" when she's 45 years old.

But if she is, she'll have that ace question in the hole where she'll ask the contestant du jour to name as many players who got a hit during the inning where they set a club record with ten. She could even tell them that the year was 2009. And the guesses will inevitably include luminaries such as Jose Reyes, David Wright, Carlos Beltran, Carlos Delgado, and perhaps even Ryan Church.

Heck, some would even guess Keith Hernandez before they guess Luis Castillo, Jeff Francoeur, Gary Sheffield, Omir Santos, Anderson Hernandez, Angel Pagan, Fernando Tatis, and freakin' Oliver Perez.

That's right, the largest inning of offensive juggernaution (no, it's not a word) includes those last eight names ... and yes, Oliver Perez is one of them. If you can truly cause death by paper cuts, then that's a textbook murderers row. But the record inning does not include Daniel Murphy, who made two of the three outs in that inning and should really be ashamed of himself ... because now he'll be benched for the rest of the homestand knowing Snoop.

Of course, I missed the damn inning ... partly because of just plain "stuff", but partly because I was in no rush to get back to the television after Perez gave up a bomb to Adam LaRoche to give the Braves a 4-0 lead, and I launched into some sort of song where the lyrics "I hate you Ollie" were prominent, and stormed off to go on a string of activities ... not the least important of which was dinner. What happens? They set records. The team who's about seven injuries away from me playing left field set a franchise record. I missed it. I suck.

Not that the record or the win makes me feel any better. In May I would have been reassured by Oliver Perez beating Derek Lowe ... "hey, looks like the Mets made the right choice, eh?" Now? It's only part of the cruel irony of 2009. It's like slaying the dragon ... when you're 100 games out. Because Ryan Church will leave New York at the end of the series still trying to make the playoffs, while Snoop Manuel will be trying to avoid Jeff Wilpon in the hallways.

Speaking of:

Mets manager Jerry Manuel's support system is eroding. First, his main backer, Tony Bernazard, the top aide of GM Omar Minaya, was fired. Now we're hearing that Minaya is about to be "reassigned," and John Ricco will be promoted to the GM job, an indication that the owner's son, Jeff Wilpon, wants to expand his involvement in day-to-day duties.

Oh, that's the solution to this mess ... more Wilpon. Why didn't I think of that? I feel better already. Hey when you "reassign" Minaya, can you please assign him to my apartment to slit my wrists with a plastic spoon while Alexi Panos asks me to name all the pitchers that have had a no-hitter after leaving the Mets? Thanks.

It's So Big ...

Johan Santana: You know Nelson, this big chipotle cheesesteak sandwich from Subway restaurant is so big ...

Nelson Figueroa: Yeah, it's playing in the majors big.

Johan: No no no, it's winning the Cy Young big.

Nelson: No, it's pitching a no-hitter big.

Nolan Ryan: No no Nelson, it's pitching seven no-hitters after you leave the Mets big.

Angel Pagan: No Nolan, it's constantly holding at third base on singles to the outfield big.

Luis Castillo: No Angel, it's falling down the dugout steps and spraining your ankle big.

Hospital for Special Surgery: No Luis, it's diagnosing your injury and having people who know nothing about medicine prescribe a cortisone shot big.

Snoop Manuel: No doctors, it's not needing tendons to play baseball big.

Jose Reyes: No coach, it's not being able to run because of that tendon that I supposedly don't need big.

K-Rod: No Jose, it's blowing a 7-5 lead in the ninth big.

Johan: Wait a minute Frankie, it's not that big.

Sean Green: No Frankie, it's hitting the first batter you see in a tie game with the bases loaded with your first pitch big.

Albert Pujols: No Sean, it's hitting a grand slam to put the game away while playing lion to your christian big.

Johan Santana: Come on guys ...

David Wright: No Albert, it's having your season end in August big.

Carlos Beltran: No David, it's having your season end when all of your stars eventually land on the disabled list big.

Oliver Perez: No Carlos, it's having your season end when you let Derek Lowe go to Atlanta to sign a mediocre lefty to an overpriced contract big.

Fred Wilpon: No Oliver, it's having your season end when you get taken for $700 million on a ponzi scheme big.

Johan Santana: Yeah, I guess you're right.

Johan Santana: Hey, who took my f***ing chipotle cheesesteak sandwich from Subway restaurant???

Angel Berroa: (Mumbles with mouth full of sandwich) What?

Animals Sprouting Wings

The Mets won a series! I must go to a bar and celebrate. Perhaps I can get there on the back of one of those flying pigs I've been seeing the last couple of hours

Well good thing the Mets won the series in Houston on Sunday. You never know what could happen with Mike Scott looming for the next game.

Oh, no no. Thankfully the only Houston the Mets will be facing on Monday will be Huston Street, who hasn't walked anybody in about the same period of time that David Wright went without hitting a home run.

The Mets didn't need a home run today as they strung some hits together, including a shocking triple by Luis Castillo. It was shocking in its pure distance to the power alley from the lefthanded bat of Castillo ... clearly trying to overcompensate for the lack of dingers on this club.

What the Mets did need was for Livan Hernandez to not be the first human to be involved in a "Cars for Clunkers" transaction. He looked like he was going to the scrap heap after the first inning, when the Astros had a golden opportunity to get five or six instead of the three that they did get (while others were probably thinking the Mets were lucky to get out of that alive, I was thinking that Livan Hernandez still only got one man out with the two runners being thrown out and that his ERA should have been about 127.) But after the first inning, the Livanmobile still has a working engine. It might need a bobbie pin stuck in it to run (or a side of beef), but it's running, and it's safe for another day.

If nothing else, the series win might make us forget about the latest Tony Bernazard story. It shouldn't, but it might.

The Mo Zone: Specializing In Spreading Self-Doubt Among N.L. Right Fielders

This is Ryan Ludwick.

Obviously, Ryan Ludwick has a lot on his mind in this shot. But what's foremost in his mind? Fernando Tatis' RBI single falling in front of him? Bobbling Nick Evans' eventual game winning two run double soon afterwards?

Or could it have been the constant heckling from the fans in the right field stands?

Maybe none of the above. But I'm not so sure. Let's just say I've never seen a right fielder run so fast after the third out of every inning.

Okay, okay. So he probably always does that. Tell the truth, I rarely study the post inning speed of opposing right fielders. But Ryan Ludwick being filled with self-doubt about his own abilities upon listening to the gentle advice of the fans in right field (part of the largest crowd in Citi Field history of which I was a part of, I might add) makes for a much better, and much more interesting blog post, so that's how I choose to interpret it. So there.

(I'll say this: If Ludwick blasted one of Frankie's offerings into the left field seats after being heckled all game, I would still be at the park mapping out a cool, dry spot on the Promenade to jump off because that pretty much would have been it. I'd like to think that the heckles played a part in Ludwick not driving one off the Acela Club, but that's just me.)

One thing the fans in right field did prove is that Luis Castillo knows what it takes to play in New York. As the game got started, somebody in the Mo Zone yelled an encouraging word to Luis, who promptly turned around and acknowledged the fan with a quick wave. Now who could blame Castillo if he wants to stay away from fans as much as possible. But there's two ways to handle an incident like Castillo's. And the path that Luis has chosen is the right path. From not ducking interviews to laughing at mock standing ovations for using two hands to thanking a fan for a yelp of encouragement, that's how you handle being an athlete in New York.

(That, by the way, is an observation first brought up by my baseball companion today, who was nice enough to rub off his good Citi Field mojo over my awful new park smell, as I was 0-4 before today. Thank you, kind sir.)

Yeah, I might call Castillo "Gloves of Steel" or "Glove of Gold, Brain of Steel", every once in a while. But if there's a guy that I secretly hope is the one to get the winning hit to clinch a division title, it's Castillo.

Of course, I also secretly hope that he doesn't have an MRI scheduled for Monday. Which reminds me, first 100 fans on Sunday night get free MRI's, so get there early.

Enjoy this image of the last pitch of the game, made possible by Johan Santana finding his game after walking Chris Carpenter, a sweet Fernando Martinez catch, and Frankie Rodriguez being just a few notches over Aaron Heilman ... at least as far as Yadier Molina was concerned.

Yeah, I Think The Mets Can Trade For Aubrey Huff Now

So what if he occasionally drops a pop-up.

Big deal if he's more and more a DH every day.

And who cares if sometimes he blasts the city he plays for.

He giveth, but he taketh twice as much away. That's good enough for me. And let's get Matt Wieters in the deal too (get off the drugs, blogger.)

And it's a shame too. Because while there's no good time to blow a save, and there's no good time to blow your first save of the season*** (I don't count Pisarcik: The Sequel). But this was an especially bad time for Frankie to blow a save considering that the Orioles, as tough a division as they may be in, are the one losing team the Mets face for practically the rest of the month. And they lost an opportunity to not only take two of three from this subpar yet improving team, but to gain ground on the Phillies, who lost three straight to the Blue Jays (and when the Jays return to Toronto, that's like 3.39 wins with the exchange rate).

(And speaking of the Phillies, don't you find it interesting that Raul Ibanez was placed on the DL out of nowhere? He apparently played the whole season with a groin strain, but when it got too much he got put on the DL. Notice there were no conflicting reports, no "he said, he said", no being stuck in that "day-to-day" limbo for three months while the team is shorthanded and no throwing away of young relievers to keep players on the bench who are hurt ... there is only ... the DL, and that's that.)

It's also a shame because Sean Green is slowly proving to the Mets why he was an important throw-in for the J.J. Putz deal (or at this point, is it Putz who was the throw-in for the Sean Green deal). He got the Mets out of an eighth inning jam by inducing more weakly hit grounders (one of which ending with a great Luis Castillo play ... see, he can field) and all I kept thinking is that Sean Green was once saddled with the Curse of Aaron Heilman because of a bad number choice. And even though he only wore it for one or two spring games (only one, I think), he still had to go through a down period before he could truly shake it. I mean, how many chickens and goats and pigs had to be sacrificed* before the Curse of Heilman was completely lifted? And how many times were there no live chickens around to be sacrificed forcing Livan Hernandez to pull a Pedro Cerrano and go get some KFC? And how many times did the KFC say "oh, we only have Kentucky Grilled Chicken**" left, throwing yet another wrench in Green's emergence from said curse?

A valiant effort by Green simply laid to waste.

And now the A.L. Champs come to town with their manager already complaining about Citi Field ticket prices. Just another thing the Mets do to fire their opposition up. Take a number, sir.

*No chickens were harmed in the writing of this blog post.

**Blogger not compensated by Kentucky Fried Chicken.

*** Brian Bruney had no comment.

It Can Get Worse: Let Us Count The Ways

You're probably thinking that it couldn't get any worse after losing 15-0 to the New York Yankees.

Just like you thought that there was no way it could get worse after Luis Castillo's dropped pop-up.

And I'm sure you thought that the Mets couldn't possibly top Ryan Church missing third base and all the errors in the bottom of that inning for sheer comedy.

Well, as I'm sure you've learned, it can always get worse. And for the New York Mets, it most assuredly will get worse. Join me in staring down the crystal ball to find out just how it will get worse, as we look ahead to ten losses that will shape the Mets season:

Sunday, June 28: The Mets enter the ninth inning with a 13-0 lead against the Yankees, yet Snoop Manuel brings in Frankie Rodriguez to get some work in. Against a Yankees lineup which rested their stars for the latter half of the game, he gives up 14 runs including a two run HR by Brian Bruney, who came in the game for Nick Swisher who blew out his arm while pitching. The Mets lose 14-13.

Sunday, July 12: Frankie gets Jay Bruce to pop up with the bases loaded and the Mets up by two. But as Luis Castillo settles under it and puts two hands up, Jose Reyes is so happy for him that he tackles Castillo in celebration. One problem: Reyes mobbed him before the ball came down. Three runs scored after the ball drops as the Mets lose 6-5. The play is ruled a grand slam single.

Sunday, July 26: With every member of the Mets pitching staff having incarcerated by the Houston P.D. the night before, the Mets force Brian Stokes into action to pitch a complete game. After throwing 147 pitches, 127 of which for strikes, the Mets lose 2-1 to the Astros when Stokes throws a double play ball over the screen behind home plate with the bases loaded. Manuel vows to put Stokes in non-pressure situations going forward.

Monday, July 27: Todd Helton hits a screaming line drive to Gary Sheffield for the final out of the game ... and he catches it with two hands. But the umpires go to instant replay to find that the ball was hit so hard that a stitch from the baseball flew off the ball and flew towards the stands, barely grazing the Subway sign forcing the umpires to rule the play a two run homer, giving the Rockies their 42nd straight win.

Thursday, August 6: Ryan Church blasts a grand slam with two outs in the ninth against closer Heath Bell to give the Mets a 6-3 lead. However, Church is called out as he missed second base. Not only did the four runs come off the board, the official scorer takes away the remaining two runs because upon video review, Church actually had the audacity to miss every single base, and the Mets lose 3-0.

Monday, August 24: After not pitching for the previous 27 games, Brian Stokes comes in a tight situation: down by a run in the ninth, bases loaded, and Chase Utley at the plate with one out. Stokes goes 3-0 on Utley, after which Manuel visits the mound to have a heated discussion with Stokes. The next pitch is grounded back to Stokes, who holds on to the ball and doesn't throw it anywhere ... all the while staring back at Manuel in the dugout. As teammates try to pry the ball loose from Stokes, all four runs score as the Mets go on to lose 15-4. Stokes is released soon after the game and the Mets pick up Aaron Heilman off waivers.

Friday, August 28: Johan Santana is one out away from pitching the first no-hitter in Mets history at Wrigley Field when the first pitch he throws to the final batter dips under 90 mph. An ambulance immediately comes on the field to take Santana away for an MRI. "Now?" Santana asks ... "Yes, now" say the doctors. The ambulance, packed with every other Mets pitcher but one, drives Santana away. The one healthy pitcher left, Heilman, gives up back to back homers to Tuffy Rhodes and Pumpsie Green as the Mets lose 2-1.

Friday, September 4th: With the Mets down 4-3 and a runner on third base in the bottom of the 12th, Carlos Beltran drives a long one out home run headed towards the Pepsi Porch. But at that moment a fan, dissatisfied with his fish sandwich from the "Catch of the Day" stand for some reason, throws the remaining portion of the sandwich towards the field. The sandwich hits the ball, which changes direction and falls into the glove of Milton Bradley for the second out. Bradley then fires a strike to third base to double off Jose Reyes, who scored without tagging up and was already in the shower. Mets lose 4-3.

Friday, September 18th: The Mets lose 2-1 to the Washington Nationals, after they've traded Adam Dunn, Joe Beimel, Ryan Zimmerman, Julian Tavarez, John Lannan, Cristian Guzman, Nick Johnson, Anderson Hernandez, Elijah Dukes, Austin Kearns, and Joel Hanrahan for middling prospects. All of Steven Strasburg's 27 outs came via the strikeout in his major league debut as the Nationals lineup consists of Jesus Flores, Willie Harris, the four guys who dress in the President suits, and Screech the Mascot. The guy in the Teddy Roosevelt suit hits two home runs off of Oliver Perez and also wins his first mascot race between innings.

Sunday, October 4th: The Mets, incredibly, are tied for the wild card lead with the San Francisco Giants with one game left to go. Oliver Perez starts for the Mets, and he squares off with Mike Hampton. Perez actually pitches a good game, going six innings and giving up three runs before giving way to the bullpen. Hampton was better, going eight and 2/3's only giving up two runs. But he got himself into a sticky situation loading the bases with David Wright at the plate. The Astros brought in Hampton's 14-year-old son Gage to face Wright, and Gage strikes him out to end the game, and eventually end the Mets' season as the Giants defeated the Padres later that day.

When asked how he picked up on the subtleties of pitching to major league hitters so quickly by the New York media, Gage credited a solid Colorado education.

Nieve Colossal

Baseball really is full of surprises.

Of course, the surprises don't come any greater than what happened to Luis Castillo last night. But to see NYM 6 NYY 2 in the eighth inning, which is when I first caught it, in a game which Fernando Nieve dominated was a huge surprise.

Is it wrong that when I saw that score, that I was wondering how the Mets were going to blow it? More wrong than FOX interviewing Castillo after a game he had next to nothing to do with? Was I watching MLB on FOX, or Oprah?

If you remember, I was the one who decided, in my own snarky, obnoxious way, to make fun of another one of these "low risk/high reward" signings that Omar Minaya likes to treat us with. And here's another reason why I hate, despise that term: Throwing Fernando Nieve against the Yankees wasn't anything that I would call "low risk". Especially after what happened on Friday, that was less "low risk" and more "mission critical". And I had this marked for a loss.

And for the 5,498th time on this blog, I was wrong. I generally like when I'm wrong. That was an especially high risk start by Nieve, and it yielded high reward. Let me be wrong all season ... like I was wrong so far on Gary Sheffield, though the MRI tolls for thee. (Why not? Everyone else has one, what makes Sheffield so special?)

You know who else is wrong? You got it: Brian Bruney. Get a load of this, as Bruney talked about Friday night's disaster:

"Couldn't have happened to a better guy on the mound, either. He's got a tired act. He gets what he deserves, man. I just don't like watching the guy pitch. I think it's embarrassing ... You know what? I learned to play the game a different way, that's all I can say. You won't see me do that, the way he acts, you won't see that. But it doesn't matter. Guy's doing his job, he's had a great career, set the saves record. So it doesn't matter what I think. I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that but, again, he doesn't know who I am, so it doesn't matter."

Don't worry Frankie, I'll be glad to fill you in on who Brian Bruney is. Brian Bruney is the guy who got a chance to pitch the ninth inning and close when he was a member of the Diamondbacks in '04 and '05, and let's just say he was less than stellar on multiple occasions. So even if he had a celebratory gesture, he rarely had a chance to use it.

Yeah Brian, I remember you. And from what I remember in Arizona, I didn't like watching you pitch.

And when you throw in the hypocrisy of Bruney playing on the same team as somebody who's own antics have come into question (during moments where said team is behind), then you have the perfect storm of please, if you would, shut up.