With conquering pitchers astride from land to land;
Here at our rusted, Citi Field gates shall stand
A mighty pitcher with a torch, whose flame
Was the imprisoned lightning, and his name:
Bill Pulsipher. From his beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; his mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that Big Bird frame.
"Keep ancient legends, your storied batters!" cries he
With silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your failed drafts.
Send these, the journeyman, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
Ladies and gentlemen I present to you your tired ... your poor: Fernando Nieve. When translated, "Fernando Nieve" in English means "Aaron Heilman". Don't believe me? He comes described as such:
"Nieve is considered an Aaron Heilman level disappointment, the once top Astros prospect was placed on irrevocable waivers."So let me see if I got this right. The Mets rid themselves of Aaron Heilman, and get themselves a disappointment on the level of Aaron Heilman. Because really, what are the Mets without a reliever you can boo?
It's like Felix without Oscar.
It's like peanut butter without chocolate.
It's like Ellis Valentine without a helmet bar.
Bret Saberhagen without bleach.
Guillermo Mota without a 2-0 count.
You get the idea. But don't you find it funny that a team like the Marlins cut a guy after a game where he hits a home run, yet the Mets sign a guy who has produced ten years of evidence as to why he's not fit to pitch in the majors to replace a guy who gave up the home run to the guy that was cut?
But Nieve throws hard. Oooh, exciting. I recall Jorge Julio throwing a baseball at high speeds too. The dents in the back of the Shea Stadium bullpen were proof of that. But now we have a new stadium, with new hopes and dreams. And soon, new dents in the outfield wall, courtesy of Fernando Nieve.
I'll be the one lifting my lamp beside the golden door.