Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Superman: Son Of Jo-El

I don't get it ... do the Mets orbit around a different colored sun that turns Jo-El Pineiro into a super hero?

That has to be the explanation. Oh you remember Jo-El as the guy who helped wreck the Mets season in 2007. And he was back at it again earlier this season. But Tuesday night was the topper as Pineiro hurled a two hit shutout and had as many hits at the plate as he gave up from the mound.

To reiterate: Joel Pineiro.

Not Bob Gibson ...

not Luis Tiant ...

not even Wade Boggs.

No, we talkin' 'bout Jo-El Pineiro ... who's obviously a combination of all three when he faces the Mets. Against everyone else, he's 1-8 in his last nine. Clark Kent for the rest of the National League, Jo-El of Krypton against the Mets. Of course.

In fact, Pineiro's hitting exploits had more of an effect on this game than he'll ever imagine. Snoop Manuel, obviously buoyed by the offensive exploits of Jo-El, decided he'd go one better: He called a hit and run with Livan Hernandez at the plate.

Now I know that this isn't your typical Mets/Cardinals rivalry ... it used to be that the Mets were the power hitting team and the Cardinals were the "go-go" team. That's what made that rivalry great because it wasn't just a battle between two hated rivals, it was a clash of baseball philosophies. And it feels weird to root for the team that has to be creative on offense, yet with all of the Mets' injuries, that's the world we live in.

That said, a hit and run with Livan Hernandez??? Has Snoop finally lost his ever-loving mind???

All right, so there weren't that many opportunities to do this tonight with Dizzy Dean on the mound, but inside a glass box marked "break in case of emergency" deep in the bowels of Citi Field, there lies a list of people decreed by baseball who should never be holding a bat during a hit and run. On this list:
  • Chris Davis (because the Rangers' first baseman has the highest swing and miss rate in the league, and is single handedly ruining not one, but three of my fantasy teams)
  • Pete Rose (because he's sixty-eight years old)
  • My niece (because she's eight)
  • Livan Hernandez
  • Jose Offerman (because we know what he has tried to do with a bat)
Predictably, the result was a disaster, much like the rest of this game ... and every game that Jo-El of Krypton pitches against this team of nine Jimmy Olsens and zero General Zods.

***

This may be a little late in getting to you, but if you feel like drowning your sorrows in steak, you can do so and help a good cause at the same time: Ron Darling and Bobby Ojeda will be at Gallagher's Steak House at 228 W. 52nd St. (between B'way and 8th) for a benefit for Urban Dove to assist New York City’s At-Risk Youth. Call 212-245-5336 for a last minute reservation, or tell your friends. And if there's none left when you call ... well, blame me.

***

Maybe to change the Mets luck, they can play this little ditty as the team hits the field at home:



I'll take it in lieu of Sweet Caroline.

2 comments:

G-Fafif said...

So it's Allen Iverson's fault the Mets don't take infield?

Kyle said...

My fantasy team has Chris Davis too, hes well past 100 K's so early in the season