Saturday, June 18, 2005

Many Thanks

Kudos all around for a lackluster 5-0 loss to the Seattle Mariners tonight:

Thank you, Dan Iassogna.

Thank you for ejecting our third string second baseman, who just pinch hit for our fourth string second baseman, who was playing in place of our injured first string second baseman, and our injured second string second baseman, while our first string second baseman in Norfolk is also injured.

Thanks for ejecting him for mildly disagreeing with your called third strike, which was three feet inside.

Thanks for calling it by the book...because umpires who have been in the major leagues for a year and a half really need to teach eight year vets a lesson about not arguing balls and strikes.

Thanks Dan, you're a peach.

And while I'm at it, thank you, 3, 4, and 5 hitters tonight. Messers Beltran, Floyd, and Piazza, thank you for making the lineup look like a Tim Horton's doughnut on a consistent basis.

Thank you, Willie Randolph. Thank you for dusting off Aaron Heilman for another important situation.

Thank you, Kaz Ishii. Thank you for not giving a player who had 262 hits last year a pitch to hit. And thanks for giving up two hits to a catcher that's older than Benito Santiago.

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