Thursday, October 06, 2005

You Know You Deserve To Lose When...

...when you treat game one of the playoffs like a spring training game by wearing stop-light red Sunday jerseys.

And when you treat the playoffs as meaningless, your fans will treat them as meaningless. Which brings me to my next point...

Braves fans, you reak of failure.

Jane Fonda Field was 81% full today (40,590) for game one of the playoffs. You mean to tell me that I could have flown my butt down to your city and bought a ticket to game one of the playoffs?

PLAYOFFS??!? (read in Jim Mora voice.)

You all should be absolutely ashamed to call yourselves fans. All of you. Really, bow your heads in shame.

And wash your hands!

What exactly are you all (oh excuse me, it's the south...y'all) waiting for...the Series? Last I checked...and you may have forgotten this...the Mets have made it into a World Series more recently than your last know, the same Mets you take pride in beating the stuffing out of every season? Yeah, those Mets. So you have nothing to be spoiled about.

Perhaps you're all busy trying to sneak in to Georgia football practice.

What? Tell me? What could possibly be more important than game one of the playoffs? There aren't 50,000 people in Atlanta with nothing better to do?

Next time you want to brag to me about how you pound the Mets into submission every year, well, how would you know? You don't show up!

You and your stupid red home jerseys. How can anyone take you seriously when Tim Hudson wears a jersey that makes him look like Martin Brodeur?

And don't throw the black Mets uniforms at me either because I'm not a fan of those anyway...certainly not for home games.

But your team looks like nine strawberry popsicles for the playoffs!!!! And you want to be taken seriously?

Here's an up for game two, an 8PM start, before FOX has to scramble and find 10,000 stars of "That 70's Show" and "American Idol" to fill the seats!



Joe said...


Ohhhhhh . . . classic.

I hate the Braves OHHH so much. They do look like strawberry popsicles!

Mets Guy in Michigan said...

Nothing is sweeter or more predictable than a Braves team exiting early from the playoffs.

And not only are those jerseys horrid, how about the hats? A tomahawk on the hat? The thing's not even balanced any more!

Another great read, 'damus.

Shari said...

Nothing gives me more pleasure than to watch the Braves go down big like that. I just want to punch everyone of them in their smug annoying faces.

Joe said...

Hey Everyone,

I really hesitate to do this - which is probably a sign I shouldn't do it, but we have a little Mestradamus Community thing going on with Metsradamus being the Mayor . . .

I'm going to do a little self-promotion and it embarasses me greatly. I have started a little blog to help my writing hobby that I like to do on the side. I wrote something last night that I honestly like and I would like for some people to read it. I warn you, it isn't baseball related and it isn't to level of a good braves bashing, but it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling on the inside.

Here is the link (also accessable through my profile, of course). I apologize for the self promotion but it is hard to get people to look at something if they don't know it exists. Thanks!

Metstradamus said...

Joe, the guy at Starbucks? It was Chuck Lamar.

And I have to ask you...

What are you eating in your picture? Everytime I see it I get hungry, and I don't even know what that is (I think it's lasagna but I can't tell).

Every pound I gain I blame you and your picture.

Joe said...

That is one of the most delicious dishes I have ever had. I'm eating lasagna at the Maggiano's in Denver. I've never smiled so much in my life as I did while eating that lasagna.

And let me give a thanks to everyone who stopped by - it's no hemmingway but it makes me smile.

Metstradamus said...

See, while "Nobody Cares about Joe", people do care about Joe's Lasagna.