Cooked In Short Order

Saturday night's loss to the Nationals make some other losses seem like a gourmet burger in comparison. At least with some losses, time and care is taken to make sure the thick, juicy burger is cooked all the way through, with side dishes that are delicious ... and nutritious. You can sink your teeth into some of the losses the Mets have had compared to the debacle that happened on Saturday night.

Saturday night was a Big Mac in comparison.

Two hours? You mean to tell me that not only did the Washington Nationals beat the Mets, but it only took them two hours to do it? I'd say that's about the equivalent of taking two "all-beef" patties that have been sitting in a tin bucket all day and putting it on some soggy bread and throwing it in a box.

And the bombs that the Nationals were hitting off of John Maine put him in a pickle.

Did I mention two hours? Honestly? John Lannan only needed two hours to beat the Mets? He must have been throwing cheese.

(Those were sesame seed puns, by the way.)

But you can't have a Big Mac without the special sauce spread all over the place, which for the Mets was the creative baserunning they exhibited in the fourth inning, where Luis Castillo thought the Emil Brown line drive was caught (which it was) but was called a hit. Brown trusted the ump's call and kept going ... while Castillo trusted his eyes and went back to first. Brown passes Castillo, while Castillo is out at second. Double play. Only the Mets.

This brings up the more important question of why the %$#@ Emil Brown is batting second for the New York Mets? Oh, I know. Because instead of having capable back-ups to compensate for injuries, the Mets are employing people that probably would be better served to prepare Big Macs.

Self-promotion alert: I'll be talking Mets on this here internet show Sunday night at 8:25 ET, where no doubt I'll be discussing the intricacies of being a short-order cook. Until then, Bad-ahh bop-bop baaaaah.