Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Stroke Of Midnight

Bong!
J.J. Hardy
doubled to left.




Bong!
R. Braun singled to center,
J.J. Hardy to third




Bong!
M. Cameron singled to left





Bong!
F. Catalanotto singled to right,
M. Cameron to third




Bong!
J. Kendall singled to shortstop,
M. Cameron scored,
F. Catalanotto to second



Bong!
J.J. Hardy homered to deep left center





Bong!
P. Fielder singled to right





Bong!
F. Catalanotto doubled to right center





Bong!
J. Kendall singled to center,
F. Catalanotto to third




Bong!
B. Looper singled to left,
F. Catalanotto scored,
J. Kendall to second



Bong!
J.J. Hardy singled to left,
B. Looper to third,
C. Counsell to second



Yes, it was Big Ben up in this Milwaukee hizzy. But before Fernando Nieve's clock could strike midnight as we all thought it might one day, Snoop Manuel came to the rescue after the 11th "bong" hit and saved him. Nieve's fifteen minutes haven't expired quite yet. However, this season is due to expire sooner than expected. What with Nieve beginning his transformation into a pumpkin, Carlos Beltran going to a microfracture expert, and Argenis Reyes batting leadoff, it's just a matter of time. Falling below .500 is only the first step towards becoming a "below average team".

And here's how you know the worst is yet to come: When Luis Castillo drops a pop-up by trying to catch it with one hand, the Mets lose and become a national joke. But when Casey McGehee drops a pop-up by trying to catch it with one hand, he atones by hitting a grand slam off a team who's offense is so putrid, they give Chien-Ming Wang his first win of the season and Braden Looper his first win in a month on back to back nights.

But hey, they came back in the ninth to close the gap to 27. They're resilient.

Everybody is hurt, there are no chips to trade for important pieces, and there's only so much that Snoop can do. And there's nothing for you to do as fans but sit idly by and witness the foundation burning to the ground. So why not sit back, enjoy the show, and roast some marshmallows. Because when life gives you lemons, you cook them.

Or something like that.

6 comments:

Schneck said...

A developing Fantasy Baseball strategy is to add any available pitcher to your roster that is facing the Mets. I guess that is especially beneficial in leagues where pitchers' at bats are counted.

kjs said...

Dontcha worry, Metsra! Accordin' to da genius callers on WFAN, it'll only take an Adam Dunn or a Nick Johnson to lead dem Mets to da Promised Land!!!

(Essential listening: Richard Neer on the configuration of Debits Field, WFAN, June 29--30, 2009.)

weesle909 said...

I don't nomally like Raissman's column, but he had a good line today:

"The Mets, as a TV product, are becoming unwatchable."

Krup said...

Fork, Meet the Mets. They're done.

schneck said...

So I turned on the Met game a little while ago out of morbid curiosity to see that Johan had a 2-1 lead. I figured what the hell, maybe I can watch them once every 5 days. Seconds later I look up to see Fernando Martinez falling down in the outfield. Shortly thereafter, with bases loaded, Braun hits a shot, goes to 3rd on bad throw and scores on Santana's throw into the outfield. I am finished watching games for a while.

Demitri said...

Torture. This is fucking torture.