Save Our Starters

If you fire up a hot stove when the weather is warm, do you risk blowing a fuse?

It was a quiet hot stove until Messrs Bannister, Maine, and Zambrano went down. Now, noone can get enough of playing amateur GM to try and fix the starting rotation, and I'm no different. Now, everybody is concentrating on which starting pitcher will be the next to appear at Shea in his "welcome to the club" news conference. Let's look into the crystal ball then, shall we?

Dontrelle Willis, Marlins: Dontrelle Willis' value will never be as high as it is right now. If Omar Minaya really wanted Willis, and really wanted to pull the trigger at this very moment, the Marlins would be crazy not to ask the Mets for the entire farm. This is why Omar should pass on this one...for now. The way the bullpen is set up, all the Mets need right now is a guy who is going to get you five innings, and give up three runs. The 'pen was built to pick up for starters like that, and the Mets have enough of them between Lima and Jeremi Gonzalez. If Omar wants to go after Willis during the trade deadline, or even in the off season, the price shouldn't be quite as high.

Barry Zito, Athletics: The problem with trading here is that there's perceived to be a wide gap between the top prospects in the Mets' minor league organization and the next level of prospects, making flexibility in terms of a trade next to nil. Sure, Lastings Milledge may be too much to give up for a Barry Zito, but are there other prospects the Mets have that are enough to get Zito (considering the A's dealt Tim Hudson for nothing, there's always a chance).

Zito, who's having yet another mediocre season, might not be the best fit right now if only because a lot will be expected of a Zito/Rick Peterson combination in the last two months of the season, especially if the price for him is high. This has severe booing situation written all over it.

Jason Schmidt, Giants: This is a guy who is going to eat innings...and that would be big in August and September if the Mets' bullpen is taxed down the stretch. Schmidt has gone six innings only once this season so far...in all of his other starts he has either gone 7 or 9. The key will be how the Giants are faring in the standings. I believe there is every chance that the bottom will fall out on San Francisco, and that they will look to deal the man with the highest trade value, and that's Schmidt. Will the Giants ask for too much?

Oliver Perez, Pirates: There's actually a rumor that Perez, the former centerpiece of the Brian Giles deal (of which Jason Bay turned out to be the prized prospect coming back), is in the radar of the Philadelphia Phillies. But as the article says, the Phillies have enough pitching prospects that there may not be any room for Perez. Queens, meanwhile, doesn't quite have that problem...and Oliver Perez might be at his cheapest in terms of trade value as his stats have taken a nose dive since 2004.

Greg Maddux, Cubs: This one is interesting. What could be more evil than knocking the Braves off their perch with Tom Glavine on the Mets? Why knocking them off with Glavine and Greg Maddux wearing orange. Scrumptious. But would the price for Maddux be too high for yet another 40 year old pitcher who may not want to be a hired gun for somebody? Probably...and the Cubbies are actually still in the hunt, so this isn't going to happen either. But wouldn't it be worth it for the reprise of the "Chicks Dig the Long Ball" commercial?

Brad Radke, Twins: Speaking of commercials, one of the coolest I ever saw was for some video game (I think) where Brad Radke is looking all serious on the mound, and some chilling voice over is reciting all of his stats...then as he delivers a pitch, the voice-over notes how many home runs he gave up that particular season. Then as he watches his pitch sail over the wall, a conga line that included clowns, jugglers, and Royals, performs a conga line around the bases. Is this really a guy the Mets want to trade for (at an eleven million dollar salary no less)?

Jake Westbrook, Indians: I know, I don't see why the Indians would want to trade this guy either. The contending Indians should want to add pitching rather than subtract. But there have been whispers about a Westbrook for Austin Kearns deal in the past. This is where Victor Diaz may or may not become handy. After all, Diaz is a step down from Kearns...all right, maybe a whole flight of stairs...but he's in the same building, so Diaz and a minor leaguer?

Anybody, Royals: As if it wasn't already tricky, trading with the Kansas City Royals is going to be dicier than ever before. David Glass has promised changes, which means a new GM, which means no guarantees as to how he's going to work in terms of trading guys like Jeremy Affeldt, or Scott Elarton who has a relatively low 3.86 ERA while going 0-4 so far this season. Of course with the Mets' luck of late, Glass' choice for new Royals GM will be Chuck Lamar, who'll subsequently ask for Lastings Milledge, Mike Pelfrey, and David Wright for Elarton before trading him to the Braves for the alley cats that live under Turner Field.

Roger Clemens, Free Agent: That's funny Metstradamus, I get it.

Joel Pineiro, Mariners: Pineiro seems to have found his touch this season with the Mariners, but that's not keeping Seattle from slowly sinking to the bottom of the division. The Mariners offered him to the Phillies during the off season for Jason Michaels, so expect Pineiro to be shopped closer to the deadline. Salary wise, he's making slightly less than Kris Benson money, which would be a bargain compared to...

Odalis Perez, Dodgers: Odalis Perez's middle name is Amadol. If Perez comes to the Mets with his 6.90 ERA, his 1.70 WHIP, and his contract that has $19 million dollars remaining on it, Mets fans will be ordering truckloads of Amadol to cure tension headaches caused by watching Perez's meatballs fly out of the park. Besides, the name Odalis, when translated to Japanese, means Kazuhisa. I'd rather take the guy who's making Kris Benson money. Hey, how about...

Kris Benson, Orioles: In a league where a man was once traded for himself...twice, why isn't this possible...especially when you know the Orioles are falling fast in the standings? Of course, the Mets would have to envoke their re-marriage rule to make this work, where Benson would have to agree to find another wife before this deal could happen...heck it could even be one of those convenience marriages that only has to last for a few days. I have two available sisters I could offer up...then Kris Benson would be my brother in law. Kris Benson and Metstradamus playing catch in the yard of the apartment complex...Kris Benson hooking his brother in law up with tickets...

Ah, the American Dream.