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(Shags cab and enters)
Cabbie: Where to?
Rey: Shea Stadium.
Cabbie: Umm, you know that place don't exist no more.
Rey: Huh?
Cabbie: Yeah, they tore that down, the Mets don't play there no more.
Rey: Then take me to wherever the heck they play.
Cabbie: Umm, you know they're on the road right now.
Rey: I know ... I also no they have no more shortstops left. So I figured I have a chance to play.
Cabbie: Oh yeah, and what's your credentials?
Rey: Are you kidding, I was part of the greatest infield ever!
Cabbie: Please. Where was that, Franklin High? Now the '99 Mets, that was the greatest infield ever.
Rey: I know! I was on that infield!
Cabbie: Yeah right. Who do you think you are, Rey Ordonez?
Rey: Yeah! I'm Rey Ordonez.
Cabbie: Well hello Rey! I'm John Olerud. Let me put on my batting helmet. Heh heh heh.
Rey: No, I'm serious!
Cabbie: Okay, you're Rey Ordonez. Whatever. Look, it's going to take more than one loss to get the Mets to let a guy off the street ... oh, sorry, "former world class athlete" to play shortstop
Rey: Look, I can still catch the ball. I can't hit, but I never could hit. But the Mets lost not only the game but like ... eight shortstops to injury. It's time to come back and be a Met again.
Cabbie: Please.
Rey: Just leave me off right here, in front of the rotunda.
Cabbie: I hope you get the job.
Rey: Thanks (pays and leaves).
Cabbie: He don't tip like no major leaguer.
(Rey rushes to the offices, but finds out he's too late to re-claim his job.)
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1 comment:
I think it's safe to say that we've identified the 2009 Mets' biggest obstacle to success: Injuries.
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