Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Free Flowing All Star Hostility

I would have thrown a brick through my television after the American League's latest All-Star victory ... but I had already thrown the brick through the T.V. when I was watching a replay of the 1995 game earlier today, and Robby Alomar pinch ran for Carlos Baerga.

Oh, and a second brick finished the job when I realized that in 1995, Jose Offerman was an All-Star.

I don't know what's worse. Jose Offerman appearing in an All-Star game, or Angel Hernandez getting to umpire in one. What, was a hallucinating squirrel not available?

And count me as the millionth person who has complained about this, but how can we have a dedicated camera to get a shot inside the nostrils of some actor from Fringe, but no camera available to show us if the President of the United States threw a strike on the ceremonial first pitch???

Or was that camera sent to stake out Brett Favre's workout for the Vikings? Please, FOX, get out of the baseball business and stick to your little Dow Jones reality show where you mix stock tips and beer. ("Buy Apple! Hiccup ...")

Now it's all good, because all Tuesday means is that the Phillies aren't going to have home field advantage in Game 7 when they win the World Series in five games and drive me over the edge for good. But seriously, that starting lineup the N.L. put out there outside of David Wright must have been put together by Satan himself ... Hanley Ramirez? Chase Utley? Albert Pujols? Raul Ibanez? Shane Victorino? Yadier Freakin' Molina? All on one lineup? Whoopie!!!

Man ... if Larry Jones had started instead of Wright I would have had a drink with those Happy Hour guys to commemorate it. (Get me a vodka stinger with a Clorox back, and step on it!)

8 comments:

Unser said...

I will throw a huge party when baseball leaves FOX. My reasons for why baseball is not what it used to be is as follows, in order:

1. Free agency and the increased frequency of players switching teams
2. Interleague play
3. Late starts for post-season games
4. FOX's awful broadcasts

number15 said...

i put this game on with no serious intention to watch it. but i too was flabergasted when the camera failed to follow the flight of the ball out of the president's hand. upon seeing the replay later in the broadcast, i am of the belief that albert pujols was too busy tipping his cap before the game and obama was forced to practice his throwing mechanics with david wright instead.

and speaking of wright -- 12 year allstar drought aside -- i still dry heaved when i saw him giving yadier molina a high five in the dugout.

Repoman said...

DW high fived him, patted him the but and offered to run into the stands to grab him hot dog. MLB's favorite Bro'in Law. Start the BBQ, put on the burgers and grab a cold one, it's all DW for his best bud's in MLB.
I really wish he'd be more like Utley, a total tool that wins!

kjs said...

Last night was nothing. The most odious thing I saw was in 2006 during the HR Derby (that destroyed DWright's second-half HR production). He was HUGGING Ryan Howard after Big HGH won the Derby. HUGGING him!

I know it's not an exact quote, but un-nice guy Leo Durocher was right:

NICE GUYS FINISH LAST*

*Or in the Mets case, collapse and finish second.

Brian said...

Repoman is absolutely right. I hear from my St. Louis connections that he even offered to drive the charter bus full of All-Stars to the Budweiser brewery for a tour.

schneck said...

I hope there comes a time where David Wright's treatment of his fellow all-stars ranks even close to the top 10 of the Mets problems. Being a jerk to everyone else didn't help Eddie Murray or Bobby Bonilla or, our friend, John Rocker much and there have been plenty of "nice guy" quality players through the years. It really has nothing to do with our problems.

Anonymous said...

Maybe I'm nuts but I could care less if Wright is friendly to these guys during the All Star Game. Should he sit in corner an pout and look mean?

Anonymous said...

Yes it is far down our list of problems. However, this team being soft is nothing new and if they were healthy that would be the big problem. Heck, until Utley took out someone at second this year to break up a DP I hadn't seen a Met try it. If your busy offering cheeseburgers and Hot Dogs to opposing players, chances are you won't go in SPIKES HIGH!!!