Sunday, July 26, 2009

General Disarray

"Some of you people oughta go find another way of living." -Bobby Knight, January 18th, 2000
I think Russ Ortiz would be wise to listen to Coach Knight.

Seriously, Ortiz is a pitcher that the Mets have owned recently. But even I wasn't naive enough to start getting excited on Saturday because of Ortiz's recent history against the Mets, since the recent injuries heaved all of that history out of the twenty first story window. The Mets that have pounded Ortiz are all either retired or on the disabled list, while the current Mets are, well, half of them should also probably think about alternative employment. SNY pointed out the stats and I thought "Uh-oh, we're going to have to start calling him Russ 'Renaissance' Ortiz after tonight because the four-hit shutout is coming."

But apparently, even when the names change, it's safe to Meet the Mets, Meet the Mets, cuz' Russ Ortiz can't beat the Mets. And not only can't he beat them, he made them look like it was 2006 again. When the Mets were scoring three runs in the first inning five times in a week, Russ Ortiz was there. Now that the Mets can't score three runs in a week, the Russ Ortiz we know and love is still there. We should all probably be thankful for that. But for Ortiz, maybe a career in genetic engineering or website design would be more his speed. Because if you can't beat 2009's version of the New York Mets, then you've got some issues.

But at least he didn't give up any home runs to the Mets ... and that's hard to believe since the Mets actually had three dingers on Saturday. Heck, Tim Byrdak played Brad Lidge as Jeff Francoeur channeled his inner Pujols. That was a monster, as monsters that go over Crawford boxes go. And David Wright hit his first home run of the month against Wesley Wright (whom I probably referred to as "Winky" at least three times this season.) In case you don't have access to a calendar (hard to believe since they're built into this here computer you're on), the month is going to be over in a week.

Thankfully, Jon Niese had the kind of outing that provides some real good news besides "oh look, we won our one game of the series, hooray!" Because these Mets need as many reasons to believe in the future as they can get. Niese, if he could keep this up, would qualify for that quite nicely.

With Livan Hernandez starting the Spalding game of the series (we need a replacement for "rubber game" after fifty years), we now return you to your regularly scheduled beatings.

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