Lotsa Hate

Every high school had one.

By day, he plays varsity baseball. Striking out everybody he faces. Hitting home runs by the truck load. Leading the team to the state title.

By night, as if he needs to do anything else to attract attention, he whips out his guitar and plays the first few bars of "Stairway to Heaven", and every girl in high school is swooning.

Bronson Arroyo has become that guy.

He pitches. He hits. He plays guitar. He laughs at guys like Alex Rodriguez when they try to slap baseballs out of his glove. He breaks curses. Chicks dig him. Guys hate him. He's named after the guy from "Death Wish" for crying out loud. He's got everything going for him. What's not to hate?

Not only did Bronson play a happy tune, but he proceeded to beat the Mets over the head with his guitar of death as he went all the way in a 4-2 Mets loss. No doubt, the women flocked to him after the game. Perhaps, we'll hear about those exploits at some point.

Meanwhile, can we officially say that the Mets are in a funk? That's three of four losses to Baltimore and Cincinnati. Perhaps it's the breaks evening out a little bit. Perhaps it's just a matter of running into some buzzsaws pitching-wise. But now isn't the time to start giving teams life. The Reds had just lost eight of nine, and was absolutely destroyed (which starts with "D" and that rhymes with "G" and that stands for Griffey who went deep off of Orlando Hernandez, reminding me why I hate Ken Griffey too) by the White Sox at the Great American House that Pete Rose Built (and then borrowed against to place a can't miss wager on Colin Montgomerie to par the 18th at Winged Foot and win the U.S. Open).

Granted, the Reds have been wild-card worthy this season, and the Mets could possibly face them in a first round playoff match-up. But this is a team the Mets need to get healthy against these final three games in advance of another killer road trip against Toronto, Boston, and The Bronx. Elizardo Ramirez (who?), Joe Mays (ERA over 8.00 this year), and Eric Milton (The Human Launching Pad) need to be summarily dissected and have their hearts shown to them the rest of this week.

Or else Bronson Arroyo gets the girl...again!

***

Did Brandon Phillips actually try the "Look! The Hindenburg!" trick in the second inning against Orlando Hernandez?

Speaking of, he deserved a better fate tonight.

***

I can't figure out which fans are cooler: Benny Agbayani's supporters in Japan? Or O' Canada from the Oilers fans?

And speaking of which, for those who were watching NBC's coverage of the Stanley Cup and were furious as the network couldn't wait to get off the air before showing the team picture with The Cup, fear not...as once again, the Metstradamus crack staff has obtained an exclusive still photo.

I saw two Whalers games in Hartford right before they left to become the Hurricanes of Carolina. The first game after the move was announced was against the Rangers in "The Mall" (also known as the Hartford Civic Center. The mall actually turned out to be two clothing stores and a Wendy's...a tad disappointing if you ask me). Whalers fans had a life size Peter Karmanos (Whalers/Hurricanes owner) hung in effigy, nice suit and all, over the atrium. We had a couple of extra tickets and tried to bring the dummy in with us (always trying to get on television), but it was too heavy. After the Whalers beat the Rangers, bitter Whale fans were making fun of us...and our response was "Wait until we come back next year and...oh wait, you aren't going to be here next year!"

We're going to hell, but it was worth the good times.

And out of the ashes of that emotional day, comes a Stanley Cup victory for Karmanos and the Carolina Hurricanes on Tobacco Road...while Whaler fans in Connecticut hang themselves in effigy at this very hour.

Remember that little slice of perspective as we sit here and complain about losing three out of four games.