Stimulus Splinter

When last we left Ralph Kiner, he was comparing Fernando Martinez to Ted Williams.

On Saturday, Kiner was at it again ... comparing Ike Davis to Ted Williams during the SNY broadcast.

So let me get this straight, we have not one, but two Splendid Splinters in the New York Mets organization? Wow! Get that Canyon of Heroes ready for the next hundred years!

(The bad news is that in the parking lot after the game, Kiner told a fan that Frank Catalanotto, Alex Cora, Dillon Gee, his goldfish, and fagiolini rigati all reminded him of Ted Williams.)

But the fact remains, Davis has come up and been involved with five wins and only one loss with the Mets. The Stimulus has batted .350, cleared the bullpen with a home run, saved Snoop Manuel's job, fixed Oliver Perez's control, used mind tricks on Yunel Escobar, ended Jason Bay's slump, turned Henry Blanco into Rickey Henderson, optimized the batting lineup, and made Larry Jones drop that infield fly on Friday. All that's left for Davis to do now is put more Mets pictures on the walls of the ballpark, revamp the tiered pricing system, and end poverty and hunger in the inner cities. Who says he can't do it? He already has the Ted Williams swing down. The rest should be easy.

It's Just Omar Being Omar

The trade deadline will be like Christmas for most fans.

I have a feeling it will be like April 15th for us.

Taxing, this trade deadline is, because I'm not sure any of us know what the right answer is. We might think we know, but deep down when we search for a real answer, we have nothing to give. If Omar buys? He's unrealistic about the standings. Sell? He's giving up. Do nothing? He's incompetent and gun shy. The man simply can't win.

But that's the situation he's put himself in. The Adam Rubin fiasco isn't going to get Omar Minaya fired. But the decision he makes, whatever it is, is going to be judged more harshly whatever it is because of the Rubin thing. That's the bed that Omar made, now he's going to have to lie in it while making phone calls to other GM's. (Sounds all very slumber party-ish.)

But don't worry, because whatever he does, he seems to have it all under control. Never has it been more apparent that Omar is a man in control now that he's taken his "me time", and that he hasn't lost control of his job or his emotions. How do I know this?

"You guys know me - that's just not the way Omar Minaya is."

"You guys know Omar, and this was not an Omar action."

Because the man is starting to refer to himself in the third person. He's freaking Rickey Henderson! Who cares if the Mets' winning streak stopped, the leader is confident! It's like he's using Swagger by Old Spice.

("He's lobbying for a position in player development." Yeah, that was me, Omar Minaya. Before I started using Swagger.)

Heck, he's so confident, he's turning down deals for Victor Martinez.

Not sure I blame him, considering Mark Shapiro reportedly asked for Brad Holt and Jenrry Mejia. And when you look at the fact that they took the Phillies A-minus level prospects while asking for the Mets A-plus level prospects, it's proof that either the Mets prospects really are worse than everyone else's, or other GM's are ... as I've suspected ... more willing to hold up more vulnerable Minaya.

But heck, now that Omar has the weight of the Rubin thing off his chest, then Omar's going to do what Omar's going to do.

That's what scares me.

Come For The Announcement, Stay For The Food

Now that you've seen Jim Rice and Rickey Henderson give their acceptance speeches for the Hall of Fame, come and hear the official and exclusive announcement of the winner of the 2009 Hall of Hate ballot. The announcement will be made on tonight's edition of the New York Baseball Digest radio show with none other than Mike Silva at 8:00. It promises to be an exciting segment and I'm sure you're brimming with anticipation. Or is that anger?

Calling All Omens

True story for you:

So I'm waiting for my order at a Wendy's in New York City, when a young man approaches me to ask about my Rangers hat. I expressed concern about Game Four against the Caps later that night. That's when he told me that he was a Canadiens fan, and that he was getting ready to get swept later that night by the Bruins.

As we talked hockey, I told him that I had always wanted to go to a game in Montreal, that the place looked like it was hoppin' on Monday. He tells me that he's gone to plenty of games and indeed, Montreal's a nice spot for a hockey game. Then the following exchange occurs:

Him: My uncle played professional hockey.

Me: Really? (Expecting to hear that his uncle played three games for the Milwaukee Admirals or something)

Him: Yeah. He played professional for 20 years.

Me: Twenty years? Ummm ... if you don't mind me asking, who's your uncle?

Him: (Matter of factly): Guy Lafleur.

So before the biggest game of the Rangers season to date, and I run into not only the nephew of one of the greatest players of all time, but a former Ranger who was quite popular in his one season with the Rangers.

So I decided to take it as an omen, and felt better about that night's game.

Rangers 2 Capitals 1

If you've gotten this far in the blog post you're probably asking yourself "Why is he telling me this?"

I'm glad you asked, er ... yourself.

Because I could probably use one or two ... hundred ... similar omens regarding your New York Mets, who were about as present at Busch Stadium Wednesday night as I was.

So I implore of you: If you're a relative of a Hall of Famer who was once a New York Met, and you happen to see an annoyed looking guy wearing Mets paraphernalia, go up to him and give him a handshake and a smile ... and convince him that everything is going to be all right.

It doesn't matter how distant a relative you may be. You could be Rickey Henderson's third cousin. You could be Duke Snider's granddaughter. You could be Eddie Murray's grandniece. It doesn't matter. If you see a Met fan on the street, let him know you care.

Heck, at this point, your Met relative need not be a Hall of Famer. Dave Gallagher's fourth cousin twice removed? Dave Magadan's uncle in law? Jeff McKnight's baby mama? In fact, forget being related. You could be Kevin Mitchell's gardener, Nolan Ryan's limo driver. Butch Huskey's sous chef. Doesn't matter. Met fans need good omens right now. Because the Mets aren't providing any.

I mean, Joel Pineiro? Again? And this is especially disgusting because by all accounts (okay, by Bob Ojeda's account) Pineiro was merely ordinary compared to how he looked during the infamous three-hit shutout back in '07. Which means that the after the horrifying loss on Tuesday night, they bounced back about as high as a meatball dropped from seven stories. For a team that has had its mental toughness questioned, that's not a good sign.

"Even in April?"

Yes, even in April.

"If Joel Pineiro's relatives come up to me and ask me to attend their family reunion, what kind of omen is that?"

I don't know, but if you're a Met fan, you should probably run ... fast.

Get Your Free 2008 Stuff

First off, I want to congratulate Dave Magadan and the Boston Red Sox for winning the World Championship, their second in four seasons. The Sox were the best team all season, and certainly had this coming to them. Congrats, boys!

By now, you probably are aware of what this title means...it means that because of a promotion by Jordan's furniture, Sox fans who bought their furniture during a two week stretch in April now have that furniture for free thanks to Boston's world championship.

To that end, the New York Mets are being creative for some of their promotions next season:

• Pokerstars.net is offering a promotion where you can play all you want in the month of April. If the Mets hire Rickey Henderson or Bobby Bonilla as coaches, all your losses during the month are covered.
• Along the same lines, Nathan's has a promotion where if Henderson, the world's biggest hot dog, returns to active duty with the Mets and steals a base, everyone in America will get a free hot dog! (But only if you go to Nathan's between 4 and 5 AM on December 25th, 2008.
• The courthouse in Kew Gardens is running an interesting promotion: If Willie Randolph is ejected from a game in 2008, your pending court cases in October will be, you guessed it, thrown out!
• Hey, seniors! Your AARP dues for 2008 will be waived if the Mets bring back Julio Franco (as a player, or a coach.)
• And finally, if the Mets choke away a bigger lead in '08 than they did in '07, just visit your neighborhood Kentucky Fried Chicken and get all the free chicken you can eat during the month of October (boneless, for your protection.)

So you see, with all the time off they've had this past month, the Mets have spent that time wisely to come up with some exciting promotions to enhance your enjoyment of the upcoming season. I for one can't wait.

Three Hundred Apologies

I bought tickets to see The Police way back on February 26th. I had tried to get tickets to see them at Madison Square Garden and Fenway Park...with no luck. But with some luck, one show at the 76,000 seat Giants Stadium was added for Sunday, August 5th. How the hell was I supposed to know that it would be the exact day that Tom Glavine would win his 300th career game?

Oh yeah, my name suggests that I'm a soothsayer. Damn!

So please Tom, except my apologies for not witnessing your historic victory live. Synchronicity was never one of my strong points. But I'm watching you on ESPN's replay...you seemed to have the Cubs Wrapped Around Your Finger all night. I bet you were so nervous, you must have felt that you had Voices Inside Your Head. (Rickey Henderson has those same voices, you know...but all they ever seem to say is De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da. Rickey's a little weird, you know.)

And know that your efforts kept your team in pace with the Braves and Phillies, who scored five runs in the ninth to tie the Brewers, and then eventually defeat them. When I heard that after I came home, I was practically Driven To Tears.

At least Moises Alou, the King of Pain, got to play and support your efforts. And Paul Lo Duca caught your historic victory for you...he wanted so bad to be in there and be a part of your historic evening. But what could he do? All he wanted is to be Next to You. Too bad that Luis Castillo left early due to heat exhaustion. If he needed water, then some scientists suggest that all he needs to do is go Walking On The Moon.

In 2005, people thought you were through. You found out that eventually, the Truth Hits Everybody. But when your World Was Running Down, you (and Rick Peterson) made the best of what was still around. And now, you are a 300 game winner. Oliver Perez, another lefthanded pitcher, would be wise to follow every move you'd make (if not necessarily hanging on Every Breath You'd Take), if he is to someday win his 300th, when he would be Walking In Your Footsteps. But seriously, if you expect anyone to be joining you in the 300 win club soon, you'll be lonely...So Lonely.

So rather than send out an S.O.S., my Message in a Bottle to you is simply this: Congrats, Tom. You earned it. May Everything You Do Be Magic, from now until October.

(Editor's note: This isn't the first time the author of this blog missed an historic Mets game due to attending a concert. Metstradamus' very first concert attended took place on July 4th, 1985. You may remember that date for a 19-inning victory in Atlanta. Thankfully, there was a rain delay in Atlanta that night, enabling the author to witness over half of the game on television upon returning home from the concert.)

Go Ahead, Tug On Superman's Cape

If you're a Met, and especially if you're Ruben Gotay, you can tug on Ryan Dempster's cape. Because when you google "Ryan Dempster Mets Blown Lead", you get May 17th, 2007. And you also get today.

Yes, Ruben Gotay is Dempster's Kryptonite. Remember, David Wright and Carlos Delgado, who got today's rally going, never got their chops on Dempster in the first game. But Ruben Gotay singled through the left side to drive home the second run of that inning. Today? The only difference was that it was the third run of the inning. But it was, again, a single through the left side. Weird part? Today's ninth inning was almost that ninth inning in reverse. If it wasn't Gotay, Wright, and Delgado, it was Wright, Delgado, and Gotay. And both games featured disappointing relievers making their record 1-0 (Ambiorix Burgos in May, Guillermo Mota today...and by the way, I couldn't even watch Mota in the eighth. I actually left my house, took a walk, ran some errands, and held my breath. And then got home and watched the bottom of the eighth in fast forward like I was ripping a band-aid off of a fresh wound.)

Here's another weird part, the Mets beat Carlos Zambrano, who has been...if not the greatest thing since sliced bread, has been definitely on that list since late May. So what do the Mets do? Why they listen to their new hitting coach and take hundreds of pitches, leading to seven Zambrano walks, and heat cramps after Fluff Castro's home run.

It seemed as if Mets hitters spent the first eight innings listening to the preachings of their current hitting coach, with long AB's against Zambrano and Bobby Howry (Delgado's first four at bats resulted in walks)...and then resorting to the "see it, hit it" philosophy of Rick Down in the ninth (Delgado's RBI double gave the Mets the ninth inning lead). It's tough when you have an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. (Lord help you if you have Hojo and Down having an argument in your head, and then Rickey Henderson chimes in and leaves all the other voices in your head speechless.)

Give credit to Orlando Hernandez, who while this wasn't a huge game, had a little juice to it with both the Mets and Cubs in first place, Chicago being as hot as they've been, and Zambrano on the mound. Hernandez was brilliant today with his movement, his eephus pitches, and all of that ice water in his veins. But also give credit to Pedro Feliciano, who I never, ever worried about until today's outing, since he's been shaky the last couple of spots he's been in. Today, however, he got the right handed Matt Murton swinging in a big spot in the seventh, and now I can go back to not worrying about him. There's enough to worry about.

Addition By Fire

It wasn't so long ago where Lastings Milledge was the brash rookie on the cusp of blowing up at the media for their unfair portrayal of him, and it was the wily veteran pulling him aside and keeping him from the harsh spotlight, while explaining to him how things worked, giving the young man lessons in humility and selflessness.

Not even a year later, it's the same young man pushing the wily vet, now painted in some circles as the selfish one, out the door.

The many moves of Omar Minaya and company over the last 24 hours all had purpose...just maybe not the ones you might think. Julio Franco could always balance out his diminishing skills with his positive clubhouse influence and with a sprinkled in hit every now and again...that is, until the hits stopped coming, and the positive clubhouse influence came into question. Was he selfish? Did he think more about his playing time than about where he fit into the team's overall plans...or even his place in the universe?

Silly me for thinking that Franco had a little existentialist in him. In fact, Franco acted like the jilted lover who tried to paint it as if he was going to dump the Mets before the Mets dumped him. A 48-year-old with the same thought patterns as a 16-year-old...if not necessarily the same bat speed.

But if Franco was surprised that it was the Mets who cut the cord and not Franco, then think of how surprised the rest of us were. By the time 2006 ended, Franco had already started showing signs of being the waste of an out that he is at this point. But the Mets had understood that the only reason Franco chose the Mets was because of the second season that they gave him...so the Mets became Warren Beatty in "Heaven Can Wait" in that boardroom when he talked about going to the Super Bowl, and when we get there, let's already have won. It was a rant about doing things the right way, and not being ruthless. The problem was that the Mets weren't going to any Super Bowl or World Series by doing the right thing. The Mets had done their part and more by Julio. But it was time to cut the cord. Omar isn't running a retirement home here. And I hate to say this, but doing the sentimental thing for an aging ballplayer is for the fourth and fifth place teams that have no other reason for the paying customer to come see them (see: Todd Zeile putting the tools of ignorance on for one last game in 2004).

And as for Rick Down? Hey, the Mets had become complacent. It used to be the Mets who would have slower than dirt players steal bases against sleeping teams, or just simply making the smart play. Over the last month or so, it was the opponents who would turn that around on the Mets. Teams like that need a shakeup...and benching Jose Reyes for an inning in a game that you're losing by four runs isn't quite enough. Once you eliminate all of the coaches that would make no sense to fire, all you had left was Down. No matter what you feel about the job he did, and he probably wasn't as bad as 2005 and 2007 made him look and certainly not as good as 2006 made him seem, you have to admit that it made the most sense to let him go as your shakeup scapegoat.

Of course, firing Rick Down didn't buy the Mets a run with a runners on second and third and nobody out in the eighth inning, but you have Milledge scoring the winning run on a single to center field...from first base. Try that with Julio Franco.

You have Jose Reyes turning a single to center into a double by hustling...a far away concept just a week ago...and you have Orlando Hernandez stealing a base...just like old times (emphasis on "old").

You also have Reyes and Ruben Gotay with a Mets first: back to back jacks to start the game. Making history is a good thing. Being in the lineup to make history because Jose Valentin was sporting a team colored gauze pad because he tried to break up a bar fight? That's just like old times too...like Cooter's in 1986 old. (Reports that Rick Aguilera was somehow involved are not, I repeat, not confirmed.)

And you have Reyes cleverly throwing to third base to nail a runner in the ninth inning, as he didn't do when the Mets were in their funk.

Now add it all together, and then add Rickey Henderson. Imagine the comedic possibilities, and enjoy the second half.