Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Petey's Cheese Creamed In Philly

These are the times that try men's souls.-Thomas Paine
That was a quote from a man who's remains may or may not be scattered across America and England.

There's no telling what will happen to Pedro Martinez's remains, but various limbs and muscles may be scattered all over America by the time this season is over...well before the ultimate demise of Martinez.

In fact, PETA is already protesting the rumor that Pedro's suddenly tight calf is going to be turned into veal and sold on eBay.

It's not enough that the Mets are looking to plug the hole in the outfield (I don't know if Lastings Milledge is too green, but he is obviously seeing green monsters floating around in his sleep and following him to right field in Philadelphia) and now all of a sudden they have to deal with this. A tight calf in itself doesn't sound like much (especially with a gazillion game lead), but for someone like me who has trouble dealing with prosperity (who says I'm an enigma?), and I'm sure there's a bunch more in my boat (don't tip the boat over), these are indeed the times that try Met souls.


Jaap said...

They just don't give Paine enough credit for inventing the "smokeless candle."

A man far ahead of his times.

Anonymous said...

Juan Samuel is managing the B-Mets. Is he truly worthy of hatred? True - he knew nothing about Philip Humber, but it seems to me that there are so many hate-list candidates who are more worthwhile. You may even want to consider your buddy Darth Marc, who obviously ran some kind of Cole Hamels voodoo on the Mets.

Anonymous said...

Glenn Wilson . . . awesome.

Are we sure that wasn't Tom Gorman wearing number 45 for the Mets last night?

Look on the bright side, Oliver Perez pitched 6 innings good innings last night against the Clippers (1 run, 5 hits, 7 Ks). The way things are going, Ollie could be our Game 1 starter in the postseason.