Monday, June 02, 2008

The Light In Your Eyes

Ryan Church looked up to admire his home run on Sunday.

While looking up, he saw lights.

After he saw lights, he was still able to touch every base while trotting around the bases, and run in a straight line.

I'd say those symptoms, like that Hiroki Kuroda pitch, are long gone.

Good health to you going forward, Mr. Church. Hopefully, the flight that you're probably on as I type this, doesn't mess you up like your previous two.

Also, some random thoughts to follow you to California:

Were you surprised that Johan Santana is only up to win number 100? I sure as hell was. (By the way, Santana is now 7-3, 3.20 after 12 starts. After 12 starts last season: 6-5, 3.30. Yeah, he's really not the same, right ... ESPN?)

Do you get the feeling that if there is a Mets vs. Dodgers playoff series that the pitching probables would look like this:


  • Game One: J. Santana vs. H. Kuo

  • Game Two: J. Maine vs. H. Kuo

  • Game Three: P. Martinez vs. H. Kuo

  • Game Four: O. Perez vs. H. Kuo

This must be the real reason Don Mattingly is no longer traveling with the club as a coach: because he's in some laboratory in Evansville trying to figure out a way to clone Hong-Chih Kuo nine times by October.

Forget Mike Piazza, if Jeff Kent (who was drilled again today by Joe Smith proving once again that Joe Smith is my hero) is such a shoo-in for the hall of fame as our broadcast crew seems to think, what cap does he wear? What do you think of him as? And is there a club that would be proud to have Jeff Kent immortalized in its cap? And is it wrong for me to associate him most strongly as being the whiny crybaby he was with the Mets? Can we put Jeff Kent in the Hall of Fame with a Met cap just to give me a good laugh every day when I wake up in the morning?

But seriously: If Jeff Kent gets into a Hall of Fame that is without Gil Hodges, I'd crawl into a grave just so I could spin.

All right, now that I've horrified you all, allow me to bring a little light back into your eyes:


9 comments:

MetFanMac said...

"I'd crawl into a grave just so I could spin"
-Reason #3,317 to love reading this blog.

Heck, even Marvin Miller showed he knows that HOF voting is just a sham these days.

sports.correspondent.johnny.bob(AT)gmail.com said...

* Game One: vs. H. Kuo
* Game Two: vs. H. Kuo
* Game Three: vs. H. Kuo
* Game Four: vs. H. Kuo

Brilliant as usual!

Anonymous said...

Hey, we beat Kuo in Game 2 of the 2006 NLDS . . . scored a big 2 runs off of him!

Was it just me or did Church look a little out of it during his home run trot? Hope he remembers his dinger today.

Also, last night was the first time this year that Castillo looked healthy to me.

Morgan was actually prescient last night, saying Beltran can get hot quickly, seconds before his homer.

TW said...

In fairness to ESPN they are referring to Santana circa his Cy Young season not last season, but yes I would have figured him for 150 wins at least.

Quick Jeff Kent story: A friend of mine and his younger brother were awaiting the exit of the players via the player parking lot, trying to get autographs. Kent began to pull out when my friends brother asked him for an autograph, Kent agreed, the kid rested hisarms on Kent's door as the window was rolled all the way down, Kent immediately stopped the autograph process and asked, "Who's in the car?, who's in the car?" After my friends brother lifted his arms off the car Kent finished the autograph. What a cack!

The thing is he always plays like Rogers Hornsby against us, breaking up no-hitters in the playoffs, making remarkable plays in the field, key hits all of that all the while loving the fact that he's doing it against us. I hate him for all that, and i think I hate him the way most Met fans hate Chipper Jones, but more than anything else I hate the way he wears his hat!

It makes me fucking nuts.

And yes he's going to get into the hall of fame and his plaque will have his silly grill and porn mustache with that fucking hat, whichever one it is. Someone will have to remind me to go up to Cooperstown and pee on it.

Toasty Joe said...

I swear she's singing "step right up and BEAT the Mets." Must have been filmed the week before last.

Anonymous said...

Some liberal just dinged my mercedes SUV with his piece of garbage prius. Typical classless lib.

Anonymous said...

I wish he'd carved his initials in your SUV with his key.

Demitri said...

darn- I though I was the only one teaching their daughter to sing "meet the mets".

She's getting pretty good at it though, which gets me in trouble here in the Philly burbs when she sees some unrelated baseball game on a TV in a restaurant and starts belting out, "BRING YOUR KIDDIES, BRING YOUR WIFE, GUARANTEED TO HAVE ...

I was at the LDS game when they beat Kuo. I'm glad I didn't know about his history of success against the Mets.

Rickey said...

Ryan Church is the Norse god of baseball--unable to be vanquished by human hands. At this point, only a Gary Cohen jinx from the booth could undo him.