Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Mets Get Britn-i-fied!

Team bonding 101: Cut hair.

It's the oldest trick in the book. Shaved heads work probably as well as the playoff beard, with a little added instant gratification involved too. Hair on the floor and suddenly large ears will do that.

Twenty-one out of the twenty-five Mets, along with trainer Mike Herbst shaved their heads before today's game (and it's a good thing Herbst shaved his head, he looked too much like Ted McGinley, who you know as the death knell of every television show known to man, with that hair.) It worked, making them more aerodynamic and somehow in turn gave their bats more speed as well in the first inning, as they rode a three run first to beat Matt Cain and the Giants 4-1.

Of the four Mets who didn't shave their heads, three of them get a pass: Jose Reyes, because how much more aerodynamic does he need to be? Tom Glavine, because you don't mess with a future hall of famer on the night he pitches. And Aaron Sele, because he has family photo day on Thursday...professional photos are expensive, and remember that those things hang on the wall forever. For--e--ver! You don't want a team bonding activity immortalized on your living room wall.

Then there's Aaron Heilman.

I can't think of a good excuse for Aaron Heilman. Or at least I don't think we were told a good excuse by the SNY broadcast crew. I'm sure there is one, we just haven't heard it yet. It's all good though, because surely Heilman will follow suit and bond with the rest of the team, right?

Right?

Oh never mind. The last thing I'm going to do is get on Aaron Heilman after a win in which he didn't even pitch. Tuesday night was the cure for what ailed the Mets after the awful 9-4 loss on Monday. Tuesday night was the very reason why teams should still be scared of the Mets this season...because what teams are mentally together enough to do something silly like shave their heads and laugh it up after an ugly loss like Monday night? Most teams would simply forget about a loss like that and move on. These Mets? They take it one step further and have their best player shave everybody's heads before the next game. Worries? Not on this team.

Side note: How ironic is it that the Mets pulled off their most famous haircut bonding ritual in the home of Armando Benitez, who was involved in the most infamous haircut in Mets history, his shearing of Rey Sanchez during a blowout loss in '03. Tonight's haircuts are waaaaay different than that.

Night and day different.

***

It's too bad that the Mets of the 80's never did something like this, or else we would have gotten to see Keith Hernandez in all his cranial glory. Hernandez claims he would have never done this, so we're left to wonder what Keith Hernandez would have looked like bald. Well, if you're demented enough to try to imagine that, wonder no more:

Or what about the Mets of the nineties? Would you have wanted to see this:

Can you even imagine Mike Piazza going for something like that? I know he was crazy enough to crop his flowing locks and dye them blond...but bald? Thank goodness that timing is everything.

11 comments:

Ceetar said...

I don't quite have an excuse for Heilman either. Something about him's bothering me this year. Or maybe it was just watching that ball fly over the fence in game 7 last year in person. I find I have a nagging annoyment at Beltran too..

It was fun that they shaved. It gave me a laugh and it says something about the character of the team. Sure right now it's something silly like shaving their heads, but maybe next time David will come out and say "Hey, lets all hit home runs tonight" and they'll all do it.

Well maybe not quite like that. But it's team behavior like this that helps guys shake off slumps, get over tough loses and continue to go out there with a winning attitude.

They keep talking about needing to 'click on all cylinders'. And it's true, they haven't yet. And the Braves still can't get out in front. hmm...

Brokaw said...

beltran has been irritatinmg me lately aswell and delgado better start reading his old notebooks before he finds himself registering on the irritometer.

heilman is a pu$$y..

in order to test out my jinx theory, i decided not go to at&t park and the mets won.

the true test will be tomorrow with REMEMBER THE MAINE vs. THE former BEARDED WONDER

Anonymous said...

Glavine and Heilman shaved their heads after the game.

Unser said...

Here's hoping Piazza does shave his head and then smokes two dingers off of Clemens in a game, preferably a playoff game.

Mookie McFly said...

Ramon Castro looks like Uncle Fester.

And Dumbo has been telling me that he wants his ears back from Shawn Green.

Other than that I guess I like the shaved heads and I plan on going and getting it done before my next game this Saturday with the Brew Crew.

The Mets are just better than San Fran...they didn't need to shave their heads but I am hoping that by this weekend everyone's locks are gone. It will be a good sign that everyone is on the same page...and ready to get their grown man on!

Mookie McFly said...

I just heard that Jay Horowitz shaved his head. I don't know about that being a good idea. I mean Jay didn't have a ton of hair to start with...that kind of decision could be fatal.

Mets Guy in Michigan said...

Awesome photoshopping skills, Metstra!

Ken Dynamo said...

looks like thier frotting thier heads together in that one pic.

Anonymous said...

Long hair, short hair, no hair, green hair, blue hair, braids ... it doesn't matter with Wright. He's a hottie!

Jaap said...

mdjAnd Aaron Sele refused to shave his head because he's allegedly due to sit for a "family photo" and his wife wouldn't approve. Made me wonder how Steve Trachsel would have reacted...

Grinder said...

They look totally ridiculous!