Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Maybe This Is What The Mayans Meant

If the Mayan calendar holds true, and we're due for a fundamental change in 2012, maybe this was the first sign. Maybe the hints that Bud Selig is planning to retire after the 2012 season is the first hint that maybe the change that the Mayans meant was going to happen in major league baseball.

Sure, the Mayans had never heard of major league baseball, the World Series, or performance enhancing drugs. But perhaps the guy who filled out the calendar looked eerily like Armando Benitez, and maybe he just got up for a mental break and forgot to finish (sounds like Game 1 in 2000, doesn't it?) So perhaps you, the Met fan, have some real fundamental change to look forward to in 2012 and beyond.

Maybe the world is due for a change ... so much so that there will no longer be World Series games in November (don't hold your breath), or WBC games in March, or Chip Caray broadcasting games on TBS. Heck, that last thing has already happened, so maybe that fundamental change we all could use is seriously going to happen. Maybe the Mayans were truly ahead of their time.

Or maybe the guy filling out the calendar way back when looked eerily like Armando Benitez and he just forgot to finish after getting up for a piece of cake. Sounds like Game 1 in 2000, doesn't it?

Most likely, if this is a harbinger of serious Mayan change, then a series of cataclysmic events will precede it. You could say that the entire 2009 season was that series all rolled into one season, but that would be too easy. More likely, 2009 only counts as one event, just as 2007 and 2008 were singular events. And the events keep coming. Think about it: Wilson Valdez and Brian Schneider are now both members of the Philadelphia Phillies. They ranged from barely irrelevant to seriously overrated here ... but as Phillies? Schneider is destined to hit 12 HR's in a part time role in the Shoebox, while Valdez is bound by fate to be the one to officially knock the Mets out of the postseason conversation. Just as Pedro started the trend last season, Valdez will continue that tradition.

Or will it be Billy Wagner? Country time heading to the Braves certainly counts as a cataclysmic event. I mean, who saw this coming? Especially with the Braves having offered arbitration to Mike Gonzalez and Rafael Soriano ... they could have a three headed bullpen monster!

Not that it worked out so well in Flushing, mind you.

But Country Time as Cataclysmic Event lies in the fact that the Mets could have gotten those high draft picks by just holding on to Wagner and offering him arbitration, just as the Braves did. Instead, they traded him for 27-year-old Chris Carter (all he does is score touchdowns ... uh-oh) and let the Red Sox get those draft picks. But they saved $3 million which, after two of those million go to Alex Cora, will be spent on new uniforms that look like they need Tide, and a picture of Todd Pratt in the excelsior level. So I guess it all evens out.

And speaking of that bullpen monster, one of the heads that has been cut off might resurface in Philadelphia in the form of J.J. Putz. Ironically, cutting off Putz's head was the next course of action if the cortisone shot didn't work. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed and Putz was instead placed on the disabled list. But rest assured that a cortisone shot will not be on the menu for Putz in Philly. A cheesesteak? Maybe. The closer's job? If Brad Lidge cooperates, sure. And why not a game in September where Schneider hits a grand slam, Valdez gets a game winning hit, and Putz strikes out the side in the ninth to eliminate the Mets?

All foretold by the Mayans.

But maybe when it's all said and done, we'll live in a world where the Mets will acquire marginally iconic Philadelphia Phillies and steal their slogans as the Phillies brazenly did with Tug McGraw. Hey, we've got 33-year-old rookie turned 37-year-old Mendoza line hitter Chris Coste. Best case scenario, his inspirational story continues here, he gets a couple of big hits down the stretch, and John Kruk gets to write the forward to his second book.

Mets case scenario, he's cut in spring training because the club signs Bengie Molina, who will set fire to his hamstring in a freak pre-game ritual will be out for the season. And we'll indeed have to wait until 2012 for significant change in baseball, in Flushing, in life. But don't hold your breath.

Freakin' Mayans.


DyHrdMET said...

Mets 2012: Rejuvinated at 50!

Dan said...

Who is Wilson Valdez?

MetFanMac said...

The Mayans are in league with Endy Chavez's heathen gods.

Anonymous said...

Don't look now, Saito headed to Atlanta as well?

But we got Wayne Krivsky, Henry Blanco, & Alex Cora. Only 16mm left to spend!

You Go Omar!

Trash Man said...

By 2012, Minaya will have totally cornered the market on backup catchers and anyone wanting a backup catcher will have to come to the Mets. What a plan!

Nigel said...

I have been trying to ignore the Mets burning themselves at the hot stove this week. Thanks Metstra! You are the best at breaking it all down. I am going swimming with sharks now, send Roy Scheider, if Dennis Quaid, gets a shot at Left Field. I will have to watch this, for it will be in 3D.