A Cold, Damp, Train Wreck

The train wreck that is the 2008 Subway Series, featuring the last place Yankees and the dysfunctional Mets, has been washed out tonight. The one pitching matchup that clearly favored the Mets, of course, is postponed until ... well, we don't know yet. If there's a day/night doubleheader tomorrow, Willie Randolph has already said that Johan Santana will start the day game, meaning that the Yankees could put Andy Pettitte on afternoon duty while creating an Oliver Perez vs. Darrell Rasner matchup at night.

(However, the game will not be made up over the next three games, according to the Yankees press release. Meaning that Alex Rodriguez will get to play four games against the Mets rather than three, and that Johan Santana will go against Andy Pettitte rather than Rasner. Great, another "break" the Mets get.)

Speaking of Willie, if you heard him on WFAN today, boy did he sound agitated and teed off or what? He may not show much fire towards umpires, but as long as he saves his agitation for Mike and the Mad Dog, you know what ... that's all right with me.

So instead, I'll be watching that classic rivalry between the K.C. Royals and the Florida Marlins. (When Jack Norworth wrote "Take Me Out to the Ballgame", that's the matchup he had in mind.) My wife notes that on any given day, there are more people in our living room than there are in Dolphin Stadium. But to that end, during that broadcast they announced that there will be a news conference tomorrow (Saturday) morning at the site of the Orange Bowl. So it looks like the Marlins are going to stay in South Florida after all and get their new stadium. Hopefully some fans will follow.

More importantly, Lisa Lisa and Stevie B will be performing after the Marlins game on May 24th. The bad news is that there was no mention of Cult Jam.

Just another exciting Friday night at the Metstradamus house.

(Oh and one last thing about Wagner-gate: Billy, a f***ing Pats hat? You're from Virginia. Come on!)

Good Day Sunshine

"I have started to notice a pretty distinctive pattern in this world. If you are negative, it will breed more negativity around you, and then that negativity comes back. It bounces back at you eventually, over time, and you are the one who is effected. The same is also true with being positive by the way. If you try to remain positive in your life, and work, it comes back to you. It’s pretty simple. Negative people hang with negative people. Positive people, hang with positivity. And negative people more often than not, tend to be counterproductive." -Tom Green

In this space would normally be more whining about how the Mets are once again losing their chances of grabbing an ace, with Dan Haren going to the Diamondbacks. (Six prospects? How do you kids say it ... OMG? WTF?)

But it's come to my attention that I've been too negative. A buzzkill. A Negative Nancy, if you will. With this in mind, I'm going to be positive. Here's what's right in the Mets' world:

• The Mets still have David Wright, last I checked.
• No player has been involved in a late night accident in a taxi cab in the last year.
• Raul Casanova is not only a Met, but he's younger than Sandy Alomar Jr.
• Lastings Milledge has zero career walk-off hits against the Mets.
• Citi Field is ahead of schedule, and will have a Fish Shack in 2010.
• Ryan Church hasn't released a rap album.
• Guillermo Mota is no longer employed in Flushing.
• Scott Kazmir hasn't pitched a no-hitter yet.
• Jose Reyes is still pretty fast.
• There's no truth to the rumor that John Maine left the team holiday party rubbing his shoulder muttering "boy, that feels weird."
• Steven Register has not shown up on the Mitchell Report.

See, the sun shines.

***

Speaking of the Mitchell Report: Now that it has come out, and it's two guys known the world over as Yankees that are taking the brunt of the bad press, isn't it about time for Wallace Matthews to write something for the express purpose of riling up the Mets fans? I can read it now:

Yeah, Mets fans. Laugh it up. Laugh it up now that your greatest enemy has been fingered in the Mitchell Report as the biggest name mentioned. But just remember: A Mets clubhouse guy started all this. And my sources tell me that he invented steroids. That's right Met fans, a Met invented Deca-Durabolin, among other performance enhancers. Don't blame the gritty, gutty Roger Clemens for taking steroids during the season where his team beat you. Blame your team for not beating the all-mighty Yankees who, despite a payroll of a billion dollars, still scrap for everything they get. While your team is a bunch of steroid inventing monsters. It just means the Yankees were smart enough to take steroids and get that gritty, gutty edge that they need, because that's what champions do. If Mike Piazza was on the juice, maybe he would have been quick enough to have gotten out of the way of that beanball. Now it's time for all you Met fans to accept Andy Pettitte as your savior and repent once and for all.

Have I beaten Newsday's all-time record for angry comments yet?

(Editor's note: Here's what Wally actually wrote).

***

Mike Stanton, according to the report, bought HGH in 2003 while he was with the Mets ... and still went 2-7. He probably sprinkled the HGH on his cupcakes thinking they were chocolate chips.

Maybe Mike Stanton owes Met fans an apology?