Monday, July 09, 2007

Grey Dawn

After a seventeen inning game, while throwing a pitcher making his first start back from injury, not much could have really been expected, so the All-Star break comes at a wonderful time for the Mets to rest their old bones.

Old bones which seemingly are getting older at an exponential rate.

If you missed it: Ricky Ledee was designated for assignment to make room for Dave Williams, who was the sacrificial lamb on Sunday for the Mets (although when you walk the opposing pitcher and giving up a dinger to a .228 hitter, most likely, you are sacrificing your own lamb). While Ledee may not be any great shakes, the man who got a reprieve on the roster is yet another quadragenarian, Sandy Alomar Jr, a catcher who supposedly gives the Mets more flexibility on the bench.

But only when full containers of Icy Hot are applied.

It's probably going to be a non-issue when guys like Lastings Milledge, Jorge Sosa, and Oliver Perez come back (and heck, maybe if we're good boys and girls, even Moises Alou will take a trip down the chimney to give all of us orange and blue boys and girls an early Christmas gift...although Moises will probably tear a labrum while handing the gifts out). But does it bother anyone else that Julio Franco (forget his weight, the guy is lucky that he's hitting his age) is taking up a roster spot that is probably better served by going to Ledee, who at least can pull the ball and can move around?

And most likely, nobody is going to pick up Ricky Ledee from under our noses, but what if someone does? What if the Royals, still stinging from not getting Milton Bradley, decide that Ledee is the answer to their problems? Maybe that's the scenario of a habitual weed smoker, but stranger things have happened, right? What if we lose Ledee? I mean, they'll survive, but what will it have been for? To get Sandy Alomar Jr. one last hurrah to be a battery mate with a minor league teammate that he never actually caught? Is that what it's come to? Have the Mets become the home of the farewell tour? Is Cher playing Shea Stadium next week? Since when have the Mets become Robin Williams in that movie about the kid that aged like 10 years every 12 months?

And Julio, for Pete Schourek's sake, hang it up! Look, I'm all for athletes hanging it up on their own terms as long as it remains fun. But Julio, you're Jake Taylor in Major League II, except nobody has the guts to pull you into a room and tell you that you'd be more useful as a coach than a player because it not only might alienate the locker room, but they're afraid that God will smite them for pushing an old man out the door before his contract was up. Who knows, as a coach you might have to take over for Willie Randolph before the end of the season, just like Taylor had to take over for Lou Brown. Randolph is undergoing shoulder surgery...what if there's complications? What if they find Bill Pulsipher's bone chips and Victor Zambrano's frayed ligaments and Randolph has to be locked up in a hospital room until Christmas for his own protection? Then what?

Now that Mark Buehrle is off the market, the moves that Omar Minaya may be relegated to are the ones to shore up the back end of the team...the bench and the middle relief. Maybe a guy like Jeff Conine, who needs to be rescued from the Reds who are currently rotting from the inside out, is Omar's best option for the bench. But he can't, because he's afraid that you, Julio, will sneak into his office and put rubber bands where his paper clips should be. Nobody should live their lives in fear. But that's what's happening, because you want to be Minnie Minoso on a pennant contender.

Look, hard times call for hard words. Julio, you deserve a World Series ring. You deserve credit for turning Carlos Beltran's New York career around in '06, along with saving Pedro Martinez's life from the bat-wielding Jose Guillen. But you've become like the kids in the playground playing five-on-five baseball and only using half the field...but you're using the wrong half of the field. If you were that kid, you'd keep hitting foul balls all day and the game would never end. Instead, you make games end too quick by grounding to second base.

Dude, you're older than dirt, stone tablets, and Howard Johnson!

Chip Ambres is sticking pins in your doll!

When you were a rookie, Transformers was a television show. Now it's a movie, and you're still playing...although not in your Optimus Prime. So please, show us the person you are and consider what I'm saying...and make us see more than your .200 average. Show us you're more than meets the eye.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I watch the Braves' scores. I watch the Phillies' scores. I don't watch the Marlins' scores. I figure if we have to start worrying about the Marlins, then we're altogether screwed in 2007 anyhow.

That's how I view the DFA of Ricky Ledee. If "oh no, Ricky Ledee went off and became Marco Scutaro" becomes the difference on this team, then this team isn't restaurant-quality after all.

Except maybe for the early bird special.

Anon said...

Look it up. He was in his third year in the league when transformers came out...

Anonymous said...

I don't recommend back surgery before the all star break. Do it in the off season.

I was so hoping for a sweep of the straws, you know just to make my back feel like I don't have a 2 inch cut back there. But, no.... Thanks to the mets offense and oh yeah.. THE METS OFFENSE, the pain is more intense. Trust me percocet is not doing the trick. Then, I watched Copa America, Peru v. Argentina. Peruvians don't like argentinians too much.. they remind me of the Yankees. Puaggg!!! Anyway, I changed the channel to see what the final score of the mets game was, turn back to Univision and there it was, the score was 4-0 Argentina. Hmmm and of course I want to get up and kick my dog, but I can't!!!!! My back doesn't wanna listen to my brain.


Now I'm wondering if my surgeon was a braves fan cause I still feel that tingly sensation on my legs and feet.

The worst part of it all is that I can't chase my 5 year old `around for the remote.

does anybody think our metsies are tired? or out of it? are they bored? what the ^&@#$%$# IS GOING ON??

Anonymous said...

hahah! You Mutt$ fans just don't get it do you. An innocent man is swallowed up by the systm and his whole life is ruined and you don't care you just watch your baseball like sheep. it could happen to you next time. then how will youf eel? when you beg your fellow citizens to stand up against tearany they will say 'sorry. we are too busy watching a baseball game'. it's really sad.

Anonymous said...

the other night Dw smacked a single to right and ambled into 1st base to be greeted by HOJO.

As they jabbered at 1st base I looked them and thought they looked as if they could be related.

Anonymous said...

Will you add Billy Wagner to the "Hate List" now that he has blown an All-Star game like the NL players on your list? The dinger he gave up ended up being the difference in the game. IF the Mets make the World Series and don't have the home field advantage, you won't have Trevor Hoffman to pick on.

Jeffrey said...

*****makes a plea for tony larussa/pujols to be on the hate list*****

Anonymous said...

Well mastra, your plea has been satisfied. Franco has finally been designed for assignment, leaving his place on the roster to the (much?) younger Sandy Alomar Jr. So now our bench is eight years younger than before.
Whoo whoo