The Chan Ho Experience

It's always nice to beat the Philadelphia Phillies. But I'll be honest with you: If the Mets didn't do what they did to Chan Ho Park tonight, I would have gone on this space and called for the decertification of the Mets franchise. I would have lobbied the family of Chub Feeney to get that done.

Friday night was one that they had to have, and should have had. Thankfully, they didn't play down to the level of competition (translated: they didn't turn Chan Ho Park into Greg Maddux) and they indeed got that 7-4 win Friday night.

(As much as Mets fans and Phillies fans are blood enemies, fans of both teams will walk arm in arm on one fact: and that's the fact that Chan Ho Park stinks no matter what side of the rivalry he's on. I mean, Mike Pelfrey almost hit a homer off him.)

And I humbly pass along my title as soothsayer to Bobby O, who predicted before the game that Pedro Feliciano would be the deciding factor. He certainly was as important as anyone, as he pitched 1 2/3's innings facing the hard lefties and the somewhat difficult righties and minimized the damage in the sixth and seventh innings. Sure, one may point out that he did give up a dinger to Chase Utley and that he received a gift when Greg Dobbs ran the bases as if his eyes were bigger than his stomach. But last year, Pedro wasn't getting anyone out in that situation. He did what he had to do, which was get the ball to Putz (I love him more today than yesterday ... but hopefully not as much as tomorrow) and Frankie.

I don't know what to expect from Oliver Perez tomorrow. Well no, I take that back. I fully expect he's going to pitch like garbage. But it seems that whenever I have a strong feeling that way no matter who the pitcher, he comes up huge. And Perez does pitch well against the Phillies, so I'm all for Ollie staying in the rotation tomorrow. He absolutely can come up huge. I don't expect it, but that's why it could happen.

And by the way, Gary Sheffield will most likely be in the lineup tomorrow against Jamie Moyer. Lifetime, he's hitting .481 (13 for 27) with four home runs. So I expect success. But that's why an 0-for-4 will most likely happen.

Win One, Lose Two

Great. Carlos Delgado hits two mammoth home runs, Johan Santana keeps the Mets in first place after Pedro gets knocked around in the opener (by the way, Greg Dobbs is really starting to piss me off), and what little fun I enjoy is ruined with the news that Billy Wagner is out for the season. Fasten your seat belts, indeed.

Help us Obi Wan Ayala. You're our only hope.

Why Does Aaron Heilman Insist on Torturing Me?

I hate being right.

You think I enjoy this? You think I enjoy being right about things like this?

"Don't make me look like a moron and implode against the Phillies (Now watch him do it just to spite me.)." -Metstradamus on Aaron Heilman, just about 24 hours ago.

So what does he do? And more importantly, how long did it take for him to do it?

I'll tell you how long: two pitches. Two lousy pitches. From 5-1 to 5-4 in just two pitches thanks to Heilman and Greg Dobbs.

That's what I get for trying to give a middle reliever credit for pitching scoreless innings instead of merely blasting them for giving up big home runs. Stupid me trying to empathize and be true to my Libra sign and be fair.

Well ha ha, very funny Aaron Heilman. Bet you got a good laugh out of that one. You've made me look like a moron for the last time!!!

***

On the bright side, hey they won!

And on the brighter side, Johan Santana pitched a helluva game (before Heilman made his line look worse than it should have been), with the bullpen in need of a rest after a 14-inning game. Certain Mets fans should be expecting a letter in the mail soon because of this game. Here's a sneak peek*:

*Disclaimer: Not an actual letter. Please don't sue.