WHAT THE CRITICS ARE SAYING ABOUT "THE MUSINGS AND PROPHECIES OF METSTRADAMUS
"Well, there's 5 mins I won't ever get back in my life. Was it supposed to be funny?" -Matty
"Drop your skirt and climb down off the table already."-Dave Crockett
"Could we be anymore dramatic? Relax,the sky is not falling..."-Steve
"Some times you have to let it go Mr. Testosterone."-Anonymous
"With all due respect, shut up."-anonymous
"Metstra, hardly a collapse you dumbass"-Mark
"You're an idiot...How about being partial in your reproting. Who are you John Sterling"-anonymous
"This post was stupid and pointless...What on earth did this display except that you're cranky?"-anonymous
"You write a lot. What's with that?"-Jen Gyllenhaal (No relation, I think)
"Did you spend thanxgiving over @ Michael Irvin's house????"-Jabair
"What is wrong with you? I've got to put you out of your misery..."-Darth Marc
"For a good time, call Mr. Met. 718-577-TIXX"-Mr. Met
"Go to hell."-Erica
"You Bastard!"-Erik Love
"I want this guy dead."-frozeropes, a quote taken shamelessly out of context
"I threw up just a little bit in my mouth."-my brother
"As someone who loves holiday song parodies, this gets a big-time thumbs up."-Mark Simon
"Bite me."-Mario
"Photoballs? Bleeping photoballs?"-Greg Prince
"Sometimes a franchise just has a big, black mark over it and no amount of wishful thinking can turn the tide..."-Jaap Still
"Brilliant use of an instructional picture book."-Kyle in Newport News
"Does Met$tra have a gambling problem?"-Erik Love
"Hasta la vista baby. I throw up the white flag."-Joe
"I'm still a fan, but enough is enough."-Meet the Mets
"I watch the grass grow - it's more exciting."-David
"Freaking Chipper Jones. I HATE Freaking Chipper Jones."-Dave Murray
"Good God man, what have you done??!! You've released the genie from the bottle. I see the showers and toilets backing up at Shea, emergency landings at LGA, unusual tides in Flushing Bay, and when they break ground for the new stadium the construction gang will unearth and disturb some ancient Indian burial ground for unlucky and cursed members of the Iroquois nation...Blaspheme no more Metstradamus! You are tempting the fates!"-The Metmaster
I am contractually obligated to tell you that the Mets have signed Ryota Igarashi. I don't know who he is. But from all I've read about him I can tell you who he's not: The Greg Maddux of Japan like Satoru Komiyama was. Or the Tom Glavine of Japan, the Steve Carlton of Japan or even the Danny Graves of Japan. He hasn't been compared to anybody to get our hopes up so they can mercilessly be torn down at the first home run he gives up to Chase Utley.
For those who can't convert kilometers to miles in their head, he throws about 93 in the above clip. And as you can see he wears number 53, just like our manager Chuckles. I hope Snoop gives up 53 because he really doesn't need to wear a number.
Comedy for his jokes, tragedy for when he gets fired after bringing Igarashi in at the wrong time, or for bringing him in 16 straight days until his arm falls off, then leaving him in the back of the bullpen to play Clue with Sean Green for a month. Yeah, this oughta work out well.
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Oh by the way, when the Mets put in the new plasma replacement booth next to the Shake Shack, I hope they paint it blue and orange. There's nothing worse than not recognizing your history when you're hawking platelets that are sponsored by Verizon.
6 comments:
Schneck
said...
I love your idea for Manuel's new uniform but may be we can have a smiling Omar next to a sad looking Jeffy instead. Also, my word verification word is 'spermol.' I'm afraid to look it up.
Why not grab the woman that throws the sidearm knuckler while they're at it. She's been compared to Michelle Wie. At least we have something to go on with that one...
Who is he? I have read reports that the mets have been interested in him for the past 2 years. Never heard of him. And let's face it, the Mets have not had outstanding success with any of their direct from Japan acquisitions.
6 comments:
I love your idea for Manuel's new uniform but may be we can have a smiling Omar next to a sad looking Jeffy instead. Also, my word verification word is 'spermol.' I'm afraid to look it up.
Why not grab the woman that throws the sidearm knuckler while they're at it. She's been compared to Michelle Wie. At least we have something to go on with that one...
Man, that was biting. Funny, but biting.
"Chuckles" made me chuckle out loud. Is that the first time you've used that?
Does this new Japanese guy have "the funk" that our last Japanese reliever had?
Mark my words: after the Mets lose out on Bay (who doesn't want to come to NY) and Holliday, they do something stupid and sign Damon for three years.
...OR they can sign this chick
(oops forgot to post link to video)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSPw_9GX9HI
Who is he? I have read reports that the mets have been interested in him for the past 2 years. Never heard of him. And let's face it, the Mets have not had outstanding success with any of their direct from Japan acquisitions.
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