Aaron's Fable

Once upon a time there was a pitcher who succeeded at everything he tried...until he got to the Mets where he was told that his value was as a relief pitcher. So he moped and tried to prove his worth by beating Chris Burke in a race to the first base bag. But being the lazy mope he was, he stopped at a Starbucks during the race even though he had a head start. Burke hustled, and won the race.

The Astros scored, Heilman was embarrassed, and Burke refused to share his popcorn.

The End.

(???)

That was obviously the Cliff Notes version of the story, but the actual end may be written when Aesop Heilman is lollygagging to the airport to join his new team next week.

The fact that Heilman's bonehead (Cone-head?) play did not ultimately cost the Mets the game is irrelevant. The Mets were 13 games up going in, so losing a game here and there isn't going to kill them. But that's not the challenge for Willie Randolph. The challenge is to keep his players interested, and focused on the present moment throughout a long couple of months where they will most likely have nothing to play for except home field in the NLCS. For the most part, Willie has kept his guys alert and happy.

But when a player makes a gaffe like Heilman's...and when that player is a guy who has been talked about as not having his entire heart in his job because of his role...there's a problem. And when that player is on the cusp of trade rumors where it's entirely possible that Mets brass is going back and forth on what to do with him, well let's just say that if I was Freddy Garcia I wouldn't look at any real estate in Illinois or Wisconsin. Because just as winning is contagious, so is laziness. That frame of mind needs to be quarantined before it spreads to the rest of the team by the time the playoffs roll around...whether by conversation, by role change, or by trade.

In a related story, during a recent airing of "Baseball Tonight" Tim Kurkjian forced to guess that Marlins reliever Joe Borowski would be a Met by the time the trade deadline comes and goes. I'm not sure how much sense that makes, and even Kurkjian didn't sound convinced...but if the Mets give up on Heilman, then Borowski makes a lot more sense.

So if Aesop Heilman is smart, he quickly learns that relieving is his friend...or he will be relieved of his uniform and shipped off to the woods to race turtles in Chicago.

***

In case you haven't noticed, Carlos Delgado is out of his slump.

Why has Carlos Delgado been able to emerge from this deep deep slump?

Because he's not Alex Rodriguez.

For all of my ranting and raving about how the national media excessively kisses the cheeks of the New York Yankees (and it is excessive), even I have to admit that with that comes a price. With that comes the possibility that a picture of you at Central Park in a metrosexual pose will hit the front page of the tabloids. With that comes the mental pressure of everybody, including the people that spread Yankee propaganda, hopping on your back and discussing you endlessly when you're going sour. With that comes George Steinbrenner.

Carlos Delgado goes into a batting slump and nobody's breaking down his at bats, his fielding mechanics, and his suntan lotion brand of choice. Nobody makes him takes extra infield practice only to pencil him in at DH.

A-Rod currently has Carlos Delgado's slump and Aaron Heilman's mental block combined. All because the excessive good press that goes around can turn unnecessarily bad in a heartbeat...because that's the way it works with the Yankees.

Meanwhile, Delgado has the luxury of working through his problems in relative peace.

So as much as I will continue to rant and rave about the severe inequity of the amount of coverage the Yankees get in comparison to the Mets, I have to say that in this case...they can have it.

***

Staying with the theme of the media having nothing better to talk about, I was given a theory that I must share with you:

Mike Pelfrey is undefeated with the tongue.

He's 0-1 with the blue gum/mouthpiece.

Has the media made Pelfrey so self conscious regarding his tongue that he was willing to try the blue gum?

I'm not sure I buy that. But I would like to see Pelfrey stick with what makes him comfy.