Thursday, November 01, 2007

To Your Health

You ever watch a Met game at Shea and wonder aloud: "what have you been drinking?"

Once a night, you say?

Then you'll be interested in this tale about a former Met, from a book excerpt via the fine folks at FanHouse:

Interestingly, another Padre, center fielder Mike Cameron, had a more intimate experience with game-day tipsiness:

"Sh-t, I've played drunk.

"When?"New York City.

"What were the circumstances?

"I went four for four with two jacks and eight ribbies. I'm not saying that's the only day I played drunk, but that was the best one."
So how long before we find out about all of the substances the 2007 Mets were on during the last three weeks of the season? Greenies? Doobies? Frosted Mini-Wheats? When? When will we know?

And if they weren't on anything, don't you think they should have been?

Pass the courvoisier.

***

Hey, the Mets are bringing back Moises Alou and Damion Easley! So much for that whole "let's get younger" thing. Maybe they'll stick around for the 2009 grand opening of our brand new park...which apparently is going to have all the angst of the old park at double the price (if you believe in that whole feng shui stuff.

***

The fine folks at Maxim magazine think that we, as baseball fans, get excited over some pretty dumb things.
Peanut vendors who throw the bag. Every section's got one and, somehow,every section is filled with people who are impressed. Go ahead and whoop it up for the 50-year-old man in the neon shirt whose only skill is throwing bags of snacks accurately, but we choose to pity him.
Actually, we whoop it up for him because we're secretly hoping that the Mets will sign the guy in the neon shirt to replace Guillermo Mota in the bullpen. Look, Ed Glynn was a hot dog vendor before he reached the majors. And when he got to the majors, he...well, he wasn't that great, but that's probably because it's hard to throw hot dogs accurately (especially with all that ketchup on it).

But I'll take the 54-year-old Glynn over Mota, any day of the week. And that, my friends, is why we cheer the peanut vendor.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

What stadium is maxim attending games at, where there is one peanut vender per SECTION?? I go to at least 20 games every season, and I'd guess there are 10 per level, max.

katherine said...

Re: drunk baseball players.

This summer I read Ralph Kiner's book "Kiner's Corner" (in between reading Madame Bovary and War and Peace). He describes a Saturday when he and most of the other Pirates players went straight from a wedding to a game at Forbes Field. They made so many errors that the poor pitcher, Kirby Higbe, who unfortunately was one of the few sober Pirates, called the manager, Billy Herman, out to the mound. I hope I am not breaking any copyright laws if I quote the next two lines,

"I can't pitch", Higbe said, "when they're drunk out there."

Herman, who did not have his hand on the pulse of the club, appeared astonished. "Who's drunk?", he said.

"Everyone", Higbe replied

Demitri said...

As followup reading material to the 2007 Mets season, I suggest "Crime and Punishment", "The Winter of Our Discontent" or maybe "The Bad Guys Won".

You pick.

katherine said...

and "Les Miserables"

Demitri said...

is there a biography on Kevorkian yet?

Hey with Torre and possibly his coaches headed west - theres talk of more Yankees free agents possibly following. Could it be that the Yankees, too are moving to LA, piece by piece?

katherine said...

I read in the paper this morning a mention of some kind of possibly bad history between Girardi and Posada. What's that all about?

I am only interested in this as it relates to the Mets' chances of signing Posada - which I hope does NOT happen because I really, really love Paul Lo Duca. (Paul, if you're reading this, I'll be in the city this weekend - we could get together and discuss the 2008 pitching staff).

kyle in newport news said...

The peanut vendor part of this post, particularly the last paragraph, reminded me of Budweiser's "Real American Heroes" series a few years back.

That was Budweiser, wasn't it? Ah, oblique advertising tactics...