Sunday, March 12, 2006

Star Power

This is how you know it's spring training:

When you check the boxscore and you see "A Hathaway" in the catcher slot, and you immediately think of the star of "The Princess Diaries".

Then you think: "Who the heck is A Hathaway, anyway?"
Then you think: "Well this is a good excuse to put a picture of Anne Hathaway on my blog."

Then you think: "Can they custom make a chest protector?"

But when you start thinking where Anne Hathaway would bat in the Mets lineup, how the rigors of catching would cost her some meaty movie roles after the surgery scars form on both knees, whether Omar has anything left in the budget to build a separate shower at Shea Stadium (although he probably already built one in anticipation of Manny Ramirez coming to town), and who would protect her in the lineup, then your next thought should be "man, when do these games start already?!?"

By the way, his name is Aaron Hathaway. He's a non-roster invitee, there's no link to a bio on the Mets website, and he wears number 93. This means that Anne Hathaway probably has a slightly better chance of making the Mets roster. Is this good news?

***

I use to worry about Omar Minaya's aversion to young players. But after Adam Loewen's masterpiece against the United States in the World Baseball Tournament, I don't worry anymore.

You see, Loewen is the pitcher that Minaya wanted the Orioles to give up along with Jorge Julio in the Kris Benson trade. Instead, Omar settled for John Maine. After seeing Loewen mow down the Yankees (which is basically who Team USA is to me), I thought not only how nice it would have been to have Loewen in the fold, but how ironic it would have been to dupe Jim Duquette into giving up two prize lefties in his general managerial career. Of course, Duquette picked a great time to realize that you don't give up on young pitching...after he leaves!

I'll just have to settle for the security in knowing that a steady hand is at the helm...Captain Omar.

***

A question for you:

If one leg is longer than the other, and you need to add small padding to even yourself out, would you add it to the shoe of the shorter leg, or the longer leg?

Seems like a simple question to me, and I don't have a medical degree. But Mike Venafro saw a doctor that actually screwed that question up and came up with the wrong answer!

So if Mets reliever Mike Venafro had come to me, instead of the doctor that he went to, he wouldn't have back problems today.

I love this quote from Venafro:
"I was furious, but what can you do?"
Here's an idea Mike: Sue for medical malpractice!!!

Then again, I can't expect that someone who's been hobbling around like Captain Ahab for years on end without realizing that something might be amiss with his legs to figure it out. So consider that piece of advice free.

37 comments:

erik love said...

Met$tra!!!

How did you get that countdown thing?

I love it!

Can i "G" it from you?

Oh Met$tra, teach me how....

Plus, Any is hitting 100 points higher that K-Mat

If he doesn't when the starting job, we should protest

Tommy_Calzone said...

Erik then you don't wanna see Willie's quotes in Newsday today about how Kaz Mat has the "upper hand". Apparently with Reyes at the WBC Willie hasn't been able to watch Ahern at second since he has mostly played short. Seems like shotty reasoning if you ask me.....

Personally, I say cut him before you break camp if you can't deal him. Come April 3 whether or not we agree with it Kaz is gonna be booed before he steps on the field.

I am thinking this negative energy is not something we need around this club to start the season.

My bet is Kaz makes the team outta camp and by May 1 Ahern is our second baseman.


aye, Captain Omar, quick hard fast one to your port side and dump Kaz overboard now!

Metstradamus said...

It's all a mind game to drive up his price to other teams. Kaz's trade value is like a goose on its last breath...saying Kaz has been surpassed by two rooks would be akin to killing the goose. No, you want to nurse the goose to health so you can ship it to Tampa with the rest of the fowl!

erik love said...

Countdown to mets season opener info would be nicce to your fellow blogger

Sir

Metstradamus said...

Yes sir, it would be. I am working on getting to you low maintenance counter instructions. Give me a few.

Mike McKasty said...

Three things for ya Metstra:
1. Screw that guy who's whining about bandwith on a website that nobody goes to anyway.

2. What's the deal with SportsNet NY? Is it really gunna be here on March 16th (need the prediction).

3. What's the deal with Chris Cotter, part of the SportsNet NY "news team". He seems like a Braves SPY!

http://www.sny.tv/announcers.jsp

Metstradamus said...

Picture's gone. Comment is also gone. No need for either one at this point.

Mike, It will make it. I have a channel already set aside for it so it's coming. You don't need a soothsayer for that.

And on Cotter, I guess if Tom Glavine can make the jump, anyone can.

Darth Marc said...

One good reason to see Brokeback....

Anne Hathaway's tits are amazing....

Metstradamus said...

Erik I didn't forget about you. Here's where you want to go:

http://www.dynamicdrive.com/dynamicindex6/dhtmlcount2.htm

Jaap said...

I started wondering after seeing the photo of the scrummy Anne Hathaway, wasn't there a Miss Hathaway dog before?

Jane, that is.

Her facial expression one which many Met fans will be mirroring this season thinking, d'oh! Another Kaz Matsui error!

Metstradamus said...

That looks like a classic Met fan gas face. I know it well!!!

Tommy_Calzone said...

the original picture was much better IMO, why did you change it?

CT said...

Thanks man. For the record, I voted for Ozolinsh.

And in the unlikely event that McKasty's opinion should ever matter, I'll ask for it then.

mr. met said...

No love for Aaron? He was drafted in '04 from Washington. All glove no bat. Future backup catcher and in these days, that's actually a hot commodity. Strange indeed.

Anne's tits are amazing....

sweetlew said...

Anne Hathaway's tits are amazing....

Smartest thing to ever come out of the mouth of a Yankee fan....

Mike McKasty said...

Hey no hard feelings there CT, but I get protective over my precious Metstradamus... ;-)

Metstradamus said...

Tommy, there was an issue with hotlinking which has been resolved.

Mike, it's good to know I have a following willing to go to the wall for me...thank you. But I understand ct's stance and he's right...so no big deal on my end. Now let's all be friends (except for you Darth...I hate you.)

Joe said...

you know I never really understood the big hoopla around Brokeback Mountain. Gay cowobys? Big deal (although cowboy on cowboy action is #2 on Darth Marc's hot list, #1 being jedi on jedi action)

We have to suffer through Brokeback Bronx all summer long with Jeter on A-Rod action. Where is that liberals hate god guy on this?

Venafro Hates Freedom said...

It seems that Venafro's 'Third Leg' is longer than the other two.

Does he get that excited by toeing the rubber?

Maybe he needs a cold shower before pitching. That is disgusting.

Darth Marc said...

The Sissies from Shea speak!

You have players who wear the wrong brace on the wrong leg for three years and you call me stupid?

I hear that being a Mets fan is grounds for automatic dismissal from MENSA....

Metstradamus said...

You DO know that it was the METS doctors that figured it out...so BITE ME!

Brutha Fred said...

And while Mets fans actually are accepted by MENSA, Yankees fans continue to ride the short bus with crash helmets!

Bite me, Darth Marc!

J M said...

It's alright Darth...everyone knows that being a Yankee fan means automatic dismissal of menses. About once a month...but you're probably used to it by now...

Harry Sachs said...

I think the mETS are good and can win manyg gamse and perhaps evn a Chompionship.

One thing that is important is that they learn how to make crisp relay throws from the outfield becaus that is good fundamntals.

iamSINATRA said...

Guys...possible bad news.

Pedro

Metstradamus said...

Guys, sorry for the lack of posting...I am currently on a business trip. I promise I'll make it up to everyone when I get back. In the meantime, keep a blogger posted on all things Mets (that's how out of the loop I am).

Brutha Fred said...

My own personal hate list:

1. Mah Brutha's on a business trip
2. Mexico beats Rocket
3. Brutha Metstra cannot comment at length.
4. Though we all suffer
5. In interminable ambivalence

But tomorrow we meet in the plains of Ohio. I'll think about you while at the Blue Jackets game tonight! Have fun!

Harold Sachs said...

The Mets new stadium should have a hot dog stand to sell Refershments and the team good also make more money that way.

Metstradamus said...

Screw Rocket!

Is that lengthy enough for you???

j m said...

What it lacks in length, it makes up for in accuracy.

jdon said...

venafro is a left handed pitcher. i do not try to decipher the thought patterns of lefties.

Brutha Fred said...

"Is that lengthy enough for you???"

Now brutha ... had you not been traveling, would that had been lengthy enough for YOU? I think not!

;)

Metstradamus said...

Oh dear brother, rest assured. When I make my trimuphant return, I will have some things to say.

Fredstradamus said...

That's what I thought ... and your niece keeps talking about her trip to eat pizza with Uncle Metstradamus!

I, frankly, keep talking about how she pooped in the potty like a Big Girl!

Seriously though ... I had her say "Let's Go Mets" and "Yankees Stink" to some friends of ours just for kicks! I have a Vince Coleman doll I take out when she doesn't do what daddy says!

Safe home, bro!

Mets Beast said...

weird comment but here it goes... my uncle is i think third cousins with tony graffagnino... thats how his last name is really spelled, but took the "g" out becuz people called him graf"fag"nino... believe me or not... but i am correct lol

Joe said...

Hey Fred -

You go to a lot of blue jackets games? Crappy game last night, I'm afraid. I was there on Saturday for the Destroyers game, which was equally as awful since it was arena football. Ickey Woods was there though. Man he let himself go.

Fredstradamus said...

Nah, Joe not really. I went with my brother two seasons ago, but I really like it! I'm not one for hockey and have been to maybe four Islanders games in my life. But it finally clicked re: arena football, and that I can really get behind ... mostly cuz it's cheap.

The drive home about killed me after a beer and a big dinner on Friday night!