The Four Horsemen Of The 2008 Mets' Apocalypse

Perhaps Willie Randolph is hoping that if this disaster of a series against the Padres turns into another four game sweep, that nobody will notice because all the games to this point ended after one o'clock in the morning.

I doubt that's possible. Because believe it or not, a four game sweep at the hands of the Padres is probably a few ticks worse than a four game sweep against the Braves. Banks, Wolf, Baek and Ledezma: The new four horsemen that are in the process of riding the Mets into the sunset ... which is creeping ever closer ... while tied up with mouths gagged and balancing on the back of the horse (which may, or may not be Da' Tara, although the horse that Baek is riding looks like it could be Big Brown). Barring a significant change in talent and ability up and down the roster, the tombstone of this team is going to read "Here lies the 2008 New York Mets ... one run on eight hits."

Some have expressed concern about the links I posted to yesterday, that I was somehow headed over the edge. I want to assure you that even though Scott Hairston pushes me closer and closer every day, I'm still a ways away from that breaking point. But I do have to tell you ... and the timing I assure you is total coincidence, that I will be on hiatus. Yes, there will be a beach involved. But it will be short, and I will return to preach more gospel (or spew more garbage ... which is probably more accurate) on Tuesday night. Hopefully by then, there will be more of a heartbeat in the collective hearts of this team than there is in the head of Ryan Church.

Now while I'm gone, don't forget the Aaron Heilman initiative ... the one where you do something for the good of society when Heilman comes into the game. A good thing to do is to buy one of these snazzy t-shirts from Gary, Keith and Ron at their website. Buying a t-shirt helps society as the proceeds go to the announcers' favorite charities. And if Heilman doesn't come in to Sunday's game, then it's time to celebrate. And you know, the best way to celebrate is to buy a shirt with a number 17 wearing a mustache.

Maine Beats Cain, Gain But No Pain

It really was a nice try by Aaron Rowand, as he was intent on breaking his face again just to prove a point against the Mets like he did in '06.

But instead of making Aaron Rowand a folk hero again, Thursday's drive to center by a Met (this time Carlos Beltran) tipped harmlessly off of Rowand's glove while Rowand harmlessly bounced off the padded outfield wall, and the fun began for the Mets.

One Jose Reyes dinger and six strong innings by John Maine later, the Mets were finished doing what they were supposed to do and took two out of three from the Giants. (And Rowand left the game with his face intact.)

And now it's on to San Diego, where the quadrant of Josh Banks, Randy Wolf, Cha Seung Baek, and Wil Ledezma awaits for the Padres ... yet they don't seem to strike fear in the heart of Gary Cohen, who basically said that the Mets should cut through this staff like a hot knife through a cheap butter substitute. Well, he didn't say it in so many words ... but those four didn't really seem to strike fear in Gary while he was looking ahead during the broadcast yesterday. But these are exactly the kinds of pitchers who the Mets have been making look like Warren Spahn, Sandy Koufax, Steve Carlton, and Hong-Chih Kuo. So let's tread carefully ... but swing hard.

And don't forget about baseball's draft tomorrow, where the Mets have three picks in the first 33 ... in addition to Memphis Red Sox pitcher Robert Scott, their choice in the special ceremonial Negro League draft to take place beforehand. No word on whether the Mets adhered to baseball's slotting system to make that choice.